My Two Dads

underpressure · #1 4th November 2009, 08:05 PM

No, I haven't got two dads, but that was the name of a sitcom that lasted 3 seasons, from 1987-1990.

The two dads weren't homosexual, they were straight, but they were awarded custody of a young girl. Synopsis here My Two Dads - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

It was only a TV show, but I'd be surprised if anyone watched it and was recoiling in horror at the thought of two people of the same sex parenting a child. I'm guessing some people here must have watched it. I certainly don't remember any outrage about the show at the time (although I was young), and people aren't often shy about expressing their grievances with television.

I thought it was interesting, that people are maybe not that concerned about two people of the same sex being parents, but just two homosexuals being parents. I'm pretty sure the reaction to the show would have been much different, especially in those days, if the parents were gay.

If this situation happened in real life (play along here), do you think the girl would have been better off being raised by both guys, or would the child be better off being raised by just the one guy, or maybe even put into a children's home while they wait for a 'traditional' family (which might not ever happen)? (Since the two guys are single, the girl being raised by one of the guys and a female is not really an option)

PreachersWife2004 · #2 4th November 2009, 08:35 PM

Yes, the issue is that the two parents raising the child are gay. But it even goes deeper than that. Apparently, only gay people raise gay children.

I'll be blunt, I'm not for the lifestyle, but I view it as I would any type of sinful lifestyle. I have two friends who are heterosexual, living together and not married. They have two kids. I kinda feel bad for the kids because they're not being taught to respect the vow of marriage. Do I think the parents are bad parents? Not necessarily, but for claiming to be Christian they aren't taking the Christian path of marriage and then children. But I don't think they're bad parents solely because they're not married. They actually love their children very much and would gladly give up their lives for them.

I feel the same way about same sex partners having kids. I may not agree with their lifestyle, but if they're adopting (or having via surrogate) children and they can love them and give them a stable home, then that's great.

There's a lot of crappy heterosexual two parent households out there. Bad parenting is not limited by sexual orientation.

keith99 · #3 4th November 2009, 08:57 PM

How about 'Little Miss Marker'? That goes back to at least 1934. No outrage and being raised by men, and hoods at that should have generated something. At least if Men raising children (a cute little girl at that).

Hmm thinking about it in this case shouldn't any rage be because of very not gay desires?

Beanieboy · #4 4th November 2009, 08:59 PM

Originally Posted by underpressure

No, I haven't got two dads, but that was the name of a sitcom that lasted 3 seasons, from 1987-1990.

The two dads weren't homosexual, they were straight, but they were awarded custody of a young girl. Synopsis here My Two Dads - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

It was only a TV show, but I'd be surprised if anyone watched it and was recoiling in horror at the thought of two people of the same sex parenting a child. I'm guessing some people here must have watched it. I certainly don't remember any outrage about the show at the time (although I was young), and people aren't often shy about expressing their grievances with television.

I thought it was interesting, that people are maybe not that concerned about two people of the same sex being parents, but just two homosexuals being parents. I'm pretty sure the reaction to the show would have been much different, especially in those days, if the parents were gay.

If this situation happened in real life (play along here), do you think the girl would have been better off being raised by both guys, or would the child be better off being raised by just the one guy, or maybe even put into a children's home while they wait for a 'traditional' family (which might not ever happen)? (Since the two guys are single, the girl being raised by one of the guys and a female is not really an option)

Seeing that she is a girl, I can't imagine the two men living in a vacuum where there are no women in the girl's life. They would have their female friends, female neighbors, female teachers, anyone the straight men would date, sisters, their mothers, etc. The girl would certainly have women to relate to. I certainly wouldn't want to have to put my daughter through the torture of talking to me about menstruation.

I can't see how having two dads, even two straight dads, would in any way be bad, if both fathers were very loving and nurturing. It would be easier on both of the fathers. Female figures could give her the female role models and relationships that she needs.

A friend of mine lived in San Francisco. She and her husband worked in a shelter, and ended up adopting a baby that was abandoned at the shelter. She said that in San Francisco, their were many different arrangements. She knew one family where there were two men and two women, each partnered, who decided to raise children together by buying houses next to each other, and sharing the parenting. To the children, this seemed normal because it was normal for them.

It seems to be those who are from "normal" families that are bothered by it the most, cause the most verbal and physical abuse, because someone dares challenge the idea of "normalcy" and is enough of a threat to lash out in fear and anger at someone who has done nothing to them except exist.

Beanieboy · #5 4th November 2009, 09:04 PM

Originally Posted by PreachersWife2004

Yes, the issue is that the two parents raising the child are gay. But it even goes deeper than that. Apparently, only gay people raise gay children.

Are you being facetious?

I'm gay, and had straight parents. Every gay friend I have ever known had gay parents, every former boyfriend as well.

One of the possibilities my partner has suggested is adopting a child who is at risk - such as, a gay child that comes out to his parents, is disowned, kicked out of his house, and left to fend for himself.

I don't know how any parent could ever do that, but it happens more often than you would imagine, and neither of us would be "turning the kid gay." He already claims to be gay. We would simply be putting a roof over his head, and protecting him from adults that would probably prey on him, due to his parents' lack of parenting skills.

BigBadWlf · #6 4th November 2009, 11:26 PM

Originally Posted by PreachersWife2004

Yes, the issue is that the two parents raising the child are gay. But it even goes deeper than that. Apparently, only gay people raise gay children.

I'll be blunt, I'm not for the lifestyle, but I view it as I would any type of sinful lifestyle.

What “lifestyle”?
Raising a child? Paying taxes? Keeping a home? Going to work? Doing yard work?

What exactly are you objecting to?

I have two friends who are heterosexual, living together and not married. They have two kids. I kinda feel bad for the kids because they're not being taught to respect the vow of marriage.

Who says they are being taught that? Just because they don’t have a piece of paper that YOU think they should have does not mean they are teaching their children to disrespect marriage

PreachersWife2004 · #7 4th November 2009, 11:30 PM

BigBadWlf, did you even really read my post?

BigBadWlf · #8 4th November 2009, 11:46 PM

Originally Posted by PreachersWife2004

BigBadWlf, did you even really read my post?

Sure did…and it left me wondering:

What “lifestyle”?
Raising a child? Paying taxes? Keeping a home? Going to work? Doing yard work?

What exactly are you objecting to?

AND

Who says they are being taught that? Just because they don’t have a piece of paper that YOU think they should have does not mean they are teaching their children to disrespect marriage

PreachersWife2004 · #9 5th November 2009, 12:16 AM

BigBadWlf, then you didn't really read my post. When you've actually read it rather than just getting stuck on my first sentence, let me know.

PreachersWife2004 · #10 5th November 2009, 12:19 AM

That's the logic being thrown around in the homosexual adoption thread, anyway. Apparently it's bad for homosexuals to adopt because they'll tell their kids it's okay to be gay and then those kids will grow up gay, whereas apparently no straight parents would ever teach their kids that being gay is okay. So, um, yeah, facetious and sarcastic FTW.

As I pointed out, I may disagree with the "lifestyle", but I see nothing wrong with loving people raising children.

Originally Posted by Beanieboy

Are you being facetious?

I'm gay, and had straight parents. Every gay friend I have ever known had gay parents, every former boyfriend as well.

One of the possibilities my partner has suggested is adopting a child who is at risk - such as, a gay child that comes out to his parents, is disowned, kicked out of his house, and left to fend for himself.

I don't know how any parent could ever do that, but it happens more often than you would imagine, and neither of us would be "turning the kid gay." He already claims to be gay. We would simply be putting a roof over his head, and protecting him from adults that would probably prey on him, due to his parents' lack of parenting skills.