Serious Comics Questions

Folks, I have some serious questions about newspaper comics:

1) If a young caveman is 75 years old, is he a patriarch?
2) Why do they keep encouraging Beetle Bailey to re-enlist?
3) Where does Dagwood buy white dress shirts that have one big button in
the middle?
4) Why won't somebody marry Aunt Fritzi?
5) Why does Popeye always take Wimpy when he goes on a voyage?
6) Why haven't Calvin's parents taken him to a therapist?
7) Shouldn't Black people be concerned about a muscular young White man
who runs around the jungle in purple tights carrying guns?
8) When is Jon Arbuckle going to get rid of that cat?

Serious answers to these troubling questions are appreciated.

Lol

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