I'm a 21 year old young woman and I'm currently seeking desperate help. For the past two years I have been under extreme emotional depression and pain because I'm not with somebody I love deeply. There are reasons why we haven't been able to get together but I'm not going to go there. More importantly, I feel like this person and I are soul mates meaning God made our meeting possible. But the story goes much deeper...
When I was younger (about 16, 17), I believed in God very much. My heart and soul were dedicated to him and I remember being at peace with life and peace with myself. But as I got older, I started meeting people who had different opinions about God, and I started to slowly but surely lose my faith. Eventually, it did happen. And Soon enough I hit 18, and I started to replace my old beliefs with new one's that eventually had lead me to pain. My biggest regret after this fact would be the loss of my virginity which I planned to keep until marriage. But without God in my life, I saw no reason to save it. After that, I began to get sad. My life started to tumble out of control, I made bad mistakes that still bring me pain to this day. When I look back on my past, I never want to go there - ever again.
But while I was going through that pain, I met a man and slept with him (the one mentioned above). I fell deeply in love with this person, and I'm still in love with him. He is the root of all the pain and confusion I have now. Which why I'm fed up. I have turned to psychics for this problem, and now I'm feeling deeply regretful and awful for doing so. The truth is, I just need help with this situation, and they are the only one's who have been able to help me. But that's the thing, they aren't helping me because I still feel pain and emotional torment.
I'm also living with a person who draining me of all strength because he is being utterly selfish by saying he wants me to live with him, and he will take care of me. But the truth is all I want to do is leave this place. These walls are caving in on me and I'm about to explode. I get so frustrated when I think of this person and how he is so selfish. I'm sorry he is lonely but I cannot live with him anymore. I cannot jeopardize my happiness any longer. And I feel like something evil is keeping me here. The other day I saw a shadow walk across my window, but nobody was there. Few months earlier, I heard a man's voice in my room. I'm also having these disturbing dreams about this awful energy around me. And the energy is pure evil.
So this is what I'm saying, since this man's presence in my life (the one I love) is bringing me nothing but pain, he must not be the one God wants me to be with right? Or could these evil forces be keeping us apart? More importantly, I need to seek forgiveness from God in the highest order. I'm not kidding, every time I try, I lose. Something stops me. And that something is not the force of God.
I need help pushing myself into a church to come to terms with my sins, and I don't want psychics in my life, I want God, so much.
Does anybody have any suggestions for me. I would really love to hear them.
Hi, I can say for sure that God has no desire for you to be unhappy. But a life with barriers in between Him and you will only lead to unhappiness. I don't know all of the specifics of your situation but I have seen similiar ones occur with friends and family of mine. If you don't take action now and do a thorough house cleaning of your life it is very likely that the problems you have now will become the modum operandi of your life. Problems like you are having tend to repeat. You HAVE to break that cycle. It takes a serious and personal commitment to God to do it. The person you are living with may not like it, he may even become hostile, but if you feel that staying thier is such a significant barrier to your spiritual walk then you need to amend that situation as best you can. This is a good time to rely on family. If their is a friend or family member that is close and you can trust then I would suggest staying with them until you sort things out. I'm not here to be judgmental, quite the opposite, I wish to help. I know for a fact that I had a serious spiritual defecit in my life when I was living with someone out of wedlock. I am not insinuating that all of your issues spring from that, but given your regret, it may play a big role in your personal anxiety. PRAY. A lot. Then take action. Because the longer you wait the harder it will become.
Hi, I can say for sure that God has no desire for you to be unhappy. But a life with barriers in between Him and you will only lead to unhappiness. I don't know all of the specifics of your situation but I have seen similiar ones occur with friends and family of mine. If you don't take action now and do a thorough house cleaning of your life it is very likely that the problems you have now will become the modum operandi of your life. Problems like you are having tend to repeat. You HAVE to break that cycle. It takes a serious and personal commitment to God to do it. The person you are living with may not like it, he may even become hostile, but if you feel that staying thier is such a significant barrier to your spiritual walk then you need to amend that situation as best you can. This is a good time to rely on family. If their is a friend or family member that is close and you can trust then I would suggest staying with them until you sort things out. I'm not here to be judgmental, quite the opposite, I wish to help. I know for a fact that I had a serious spiritual defecit in my life when I was living with someone out of wedlock. I am not insinuating that all of your issues spring from that, but given your regret, it may play a big role in your personal anxiety. PRAY. A lot. Then take action. Because the longer you wait the harder it will become.
God bless
I agree for 100%. In your heart you know what to do. The next step is to do it.
Good luck and God bless.
__________________
'We cannot do great things in this world. We can only do small things with great love.'
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You can't give your heart and soul to the Lord and live in sin. You have to strive to live a pure life before the Lord. That's like having one foot in God's Kingdom and one foot in the World. It does not work that way.
God bless you. I will be praying for you to make the right descison.
__________________ 2 Chronicles 7:14
If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
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