Hi!

I'm from the San Francisco Bay Area (Ca.) and have recently got out of a Christian Cult (International Church of Christ). The churches I visited though very nice people, I feel uncomfortable in them because I'm not sure what to belief about their doctrine about God or the bible or in Christianity in general. Any help would be very much appreciated.

Could you possibly tell us a little about their beliefs and what you don't agree with or maybe tell us some of your own beliefs? It will make helping you a lot easier.

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The churches I've been to since ICOC seem to believe in their book of rules and doctrine and not the bible. I believe in God of course and His word that we should live by it daily and make make it our standard for living though it can be difficult at times. Jesus is our supreme example that we need to follow Him and how He lived. The ICOC seemed to believe in this except for one thing and that was the discipling of people. When you get discipled by someone using the bible you where not sure if they using the bible to help you or reading more into the verses that was their and make you do what they and the church wanted you to do. Like I said I believe in the bible and what it says but we need to be careful not read more into the verses and put our thoughts and opinions instead of what God really says. I also believe in the Holy Spirit and His leading us through life, and as mentioned in Acts 2:38 we receive His when we get baptized.

We are not sure if we understand all that you are looking for, but I think I get the point from your second post, and the following thought occurred to me as I read your messages.....

You might try the Disciples of Christ (also known as The Christian Church).

The International Churches of Christ are a recent offshoot from the same family of faith that began with the Disciples of Christ...as are several other groups. The Disciples adhere to the basics of that movement (believer's baptism, "no Creed but Christ," New Testament practices, being silent where the Bible is silent, open communion, freedom for the individual to interpret scripture), which began as a non-denominational effort in the early 1800s. However, the Disciples are not in any way extremists or concerned with disciplinarianism, etc.

Disciples of Christ are a pretty open group theologically and they vary heavily I second Albion's recommendation.

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There are a number of websites and discussion groups hosted by ex-ICOC members. You might want to check some of them out if you haven't already. There are some excellent books out there too, such as Churches That Abuse and Recovering from Churches that Abuse by Ron Enroth.

I applaud your desire to examine your beliefs and the doctrine of potential churches you are planning to attend. But be advised that most Bible-based cults' written doctrines would look like mainstream Christianity. More important is to check out the pastor/leader. Does he have a strong authoritarian personality? How do the members respond to him? Do the members see themselves as part of the elite? Spiritual elitism is rampant in Bible-based cults. Are the members allowed to disagree with the pastor/leader without being criticized or put down? Does the group encourage independent thinking? These are just a few of the questions and areas you need to examine.

Wendy J. Duncan

Thank you for your advice on this church. I will look into it. Thank you again.

Thank you for your suggestion on these websites of former members of ICOC,I will check them out. Thank you.

I was a member of ICOC for about a month. This was during my search for a church before I found my current home. The thing that caught my attention was they had baught a huge hanger for their large congregation. I understand that with 5 000 people the move was logical...space is needed. But the thing that struck me odd was that they had baught it CASH...with no loans, nothing. It cost them back then a total of R11 million...which translates into 1.1 million US back then. We are talking about 17 years ago. Also, what I saw was that no matter what the pastor said, it always came back to giving money to the church...sometimes very subtly and others very blatantly. They even had debit order forms handed out with the collection...and I understand that this is for convenience...but the minumum amount was HUGE...a quarter of some people's salary...and this was the minimum that they would deduct from your acount...or else they werent bothered. Furthermore...in this huge hanger...they sold Bibles at roughly three times the normal price in bookstores...they sold cups and crosses for also far more money than could be considered a viable profit...and this shop was outside the church...but inside...I dont know...the entire thing seemed like a money making scheme...and not a church.
Furthermore, they tried to make me either convert my friends to the ICOC or if they refused, to write them off. They tried to tell me exactly what is wrong in my life...that we must follow the teachings of the Pastors...not Jesus...but the Pastors at all times, for they are speaking with the voice of God. I finally decided it was too much for me when the one pastor actually said something in the Bible was wrong...I was expecting the devil to apear and argue with the pastor for stealing his job...for as far as I know it is his job to try to argue against the Bible. lol
Free thinking was allowed...as long as it was favourable to the current dogma of the Church. Also, another thing that didnt sit well with me was when they wanted to go on a mission to convert people to God...and I wasnt aware at that time they meant their church...was that I suggested in our little cell group that we go to homeless people, bring some hot soup and tell them about God. They didnt "bash" the idea...but they disagreed in a friendly way...they thought it would be better to go the richest area's mall...to where all the rich kids hang out...and just go talk about God to them. It seemed rather that if you dont have money, you dont need to be saved.
Another thing they believed in was praying in loud voices...displaying your belief for all to see. The pastor even in one sermon said we must be vigilant of each other so that we dont let another slip from the true path.
Let me just say...I do not believe in turning Jesus Christ into a product to sell. This is just a short version of my experiences in my stay in the ICOC. This response came to me when I read Zones's question about the Church.

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I celebrate my religion. I dont mourn it
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Sounds like a very similar experience.

Freebie, I found when leaving a situation like that, it took me a long time to trust other churches. That is a natural reaction, and you can use it for your good right now. God is with you every day, wherever you go. He dwells in you. He will not disappear if you set foot in a "wrong" place.

Give yourself some cushion for settling into another fellowship. Look around and shake the old stuff off of you. You might find you need to relearn some things. That's okay, God has time.
What we have done lately, is ask an elder if their budget is fully disclosed. Are they willing to show members or potential members how they spend their money. This might seem an offensive question to ask, but usually elders feel like they are the only ones interested, and are often delighted that we ask the question.

If the response is offense, then there's a good chance they never intend to tell members how money is spent.

I almost joined a church just so I could vote in the meetings and get the member mailings. Then I attended an annual meeting, and they laid out the budget in a simple pie graph. No details, just "we spend a fraction on payroll, a fraction on facilities..." Then they asked for our additional commitment for a building project. It would be downright unwise to give money where there is no open honesty.

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What is hateful to you, don't do unto your neighbor. The rest is commentary. Now, go and study.
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