Be at Peace. Christ knows your struggles and He will uphold you.
I agree. Jesus knows what you are going through and loves you. Rest in His arms. (BTW I have something similar with my non-Catholic side of my family. They keep vials of ashes and even bought necklaces of a portion of the ashes for my Catholic granddaughters to wear around their necks! I'm trying not to shudder too much.)
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To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. "There is one true Church, the really ancient Church into which are enrolled those who are righteous according to God's ordinance. In essence, in idea, in origin, in preeminence we say that the ancient Catholic Church is the only Church." - Clement of Alexandria, Stromata --------------------------------------------------------------
" Choose life, then, that you and your descendants may live." - Deuteronomy 30:19
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Praying. I lost my sister a few years ago and she was cremated. I know how difficult it is to grieve and also how much it hurts when the family doesn't comply with one's wishes at the time of their death.
Anytime you want to talk, I'm here for you too and you are always welcomed to send me a pm.
God's peace,
Debbie
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Where Peter is, there is the Church. Where the Church is, there is eternal Life.
"The so-called right to abortion has pitted mothers against their children and women against men. It has sown violence and discord at the heart of the most intimate human relationships. It has aggravated the derogation of the father's role in an increasingly fatherless society"- Mother Theresa
"But I feel that the greatest destroyer of peace today is abortion, because it is a war against the child - a direct killing of the innocent child - murder by the mother herself. And if we accept that a mother can kill even her own child, how can we tell other people not to kill one another? How do we persuade a woman not to have an abortion?
As always, we must persuade her with love, and we remind ourselves that love means to be willing to give until it hurts. Jesus gave even his life to love us. So the mother who is thinking of abortion, should be helped to love - that is, to give until it hurts... her plans, or her free time, to respect the life of her child. The father of that child, whoever he is, must also give until it hurts. By abortion, the mother does not learn to love, but kills even her own child to solve her problems.
And by abortion, the father is told that he does not have to take any responsibility at all for the child he has brought into the world. That father is likely to put other women into the same trouble. So abortion just leads to more abortion. Any country that accepts abortion is not teaching the people to love, but to use any violence to get what they want. That is why the greatest destroyer of love and peace is abortion". - Mother Theresa
I am extremely tried and stressed to the max, wouldn't take a whole lot more for me to say..."Good Bye Cruel World.................."
sorry for your loss and the distress added upon it. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
it has to be very difficult when family can't agree on last wishes like that. i know my parent in laws wants to be cremated and poured in a river or what not. they are not my parents and i have no say in it. i find it sad that our kids, their grand children won't have a site to go visit. but what can i say?
if it's any comfort. my mom had a friend who had a death experience. she saw herself out of her body and the medical staff working on her... looking down at her body, she did not feel one bit of attachment to it. she was wondering why they were working with so much concerned on it, like it had no meaning to her anymore. they brought her back and she lived a few more months. she was a devote Catholic. but it appear that once we die, our body is the last thing on our mind.
I think that your sister will appreciate more the masses being said for her then what's been done with her body. and if you can earn a plenary indulgence for her... even better. my mom earned one for my dad and something happened to me in return spiritually. i stopped having reoccurring nightmares about my dad at the same time, even though she only told me a week later. so i firmly believe in the merits of plenary indulgences.
may God Bless and comfort you
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I sincerely Thank You all for sharing your thoughts and for your prayers. They are deeply appreciated.
The spreading of the remainder of the ashes won't take place till Aug 1st. I am praying for the strength to call my niece and explain why ashes should not be spread. At this point she is not aware of the catholic teaching on cremains.
Anygma...Thank You for sharing your mom's friend's death experience as it has indeed given me some comfort. They tried to resuscitate my sister. I've had a difficult time dealing with that, yet I understand the fact that she was in hospital they have to do so when there is no living will.
My sister and brother in law chose to be cremated. My brother in law wanted his ashes spread. My sister told him she could comply with his wish and would not happen if he died before her. He died before her, she died 7 weeks to the day after him. Upon brother in laws' death my sister decided it would be okay to keep a vile of ashes to spread were he had chosen. However she did not give permission to do so for her!
Now...at the time of my sisters' passing my neice decided to take a vile of her ashes to spead with her dad.
I am deeply saddened that she didn't discuss this with family before doing so. Yes it is her mother. But I know my sister would want no part of this !!!
She is going totally against what my sister wanted...yes cremated, BUT ALL her ashes buried...Yes she went against her husbands' wishes, simply because she felt that the grandchildren should be able to pay respects at their grave site if they so choose. My niece was sad that her mother would go against her dad's wishes, yet now she is going against her mothers'.
I am sick about this as I personally do not believe this would be God's will...Do I say something to her ???
Hope you are able to understand what i'm trying to say.
Thank You all once again! God provided me with the strength and courage to call my niece and explain why ashes are not to be spread.
Family did allow her to make the choice...she chose to spread.
Please do not let it eat you up inside. As far as your sister & assent to the Church or whatever the reasoning was... God knows the heart.
People do the best they can during these times to the best of their understanding. It does not sound like there was any ill will or malice involved.
Personally, I never really understood all the ashes thing when the Church allows relics & such.
I'm very sorry for your hurt but I think the best bet is prayer about this situation. In the meantime, prayers for you. *hug*
Last edited by Michie; 14th August 2009 at 09:52 PM.
Faithful, you need to take a deep breath. Your sister is with the Lord. She had no control over what was to be done with her remains. Yes, it would have been ideal for her to be buried whole. Yes, that is what God and the Church desire. However, God is merciful, and He will undoubtedly understand that this situation was out of her control, and yours. Humans have free will, and your niece chose to disrespect her mother's wishes. That isn't your fault. Yes, it is upsetting to think about, but at the end of all things, you will be together with your sister again and all will be as it was meant to be.
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Formerly veritas_et_puritas
IC·XC·NI·KA
Sí na veth bâden im derel
Vi dúath dofn tummen.
Atham meraid velig a tynd
Athan eryd bain beraidh
Or 'waith bain nura Anor
A panlû elin cuinar
Ú-pedithon 'i-aur gwann'
Egor nai îl 'namárië'.
Here at my path's end I am lingering / In deep darkness buried / Beyond towers strong and high / Beyond all mountains steep
Above all shadows rides the sun/ And stars always dwell / I will not say, "The day is done" / or to the stars, "Farewell."
Faithful, you need to take a deep breath. Your sister is with the Lord. She had no control over what was to be done with her remains. Yes, it would have been ideal for her to be buried whole. Yes, that is what God and the Church desire. However, God is merciful, and He will undoubtedly understand that this situation was out of her control, and yours. Humans have free will, and your niece chose to disrespect her mother's wishes. That isn't your fault. Yes, it is upsetting to think about, but at the end of all things, you will be together with your sister again and all will be as it was meant to be.
It must be a distressing time for you. 
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