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15th May 2009, 04:58 PM
|  | SCIENCE CAN TAKE A HIKE
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Reps: 9,223,372,036,854,775,808 (power: 9,223,372,036,856,908) | | | Creating a Cake - Genesis 1 Style
TE METHOD:Create the ingredients ex nihilo, then put all the ingredients in a pan and shake the pan until a cake appears.
Note: cake is still in process of being created --- (pan is still being shaken) --- and won't be completed until the moment all the ingredients are burned up with "fervent heat", and a new cake is made instantaneously from the ashes.
LITERAL METHOD:Create the cake ex nihilo --- done.
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15th May 2009, 05:00 PM
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Reps: 47,249,488,649,861,296 (power: 0) | | | Gotta say your method uses a lot less words. |
15th May 2009, 05:03 PM
| | SCIENCE CAN TAKE A HIKE
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Reps: 9,223,372,036,854,775,808 (power: 9,223,372,036,856,908) | | Originally Posted by Washington  Gotta say your method uses a lot less words.
Acutally, we use a lot of NSAIDs.
N'God said --- and it was done. 
(Okay --- I made that up.)
__________________ GOD SAID IT -- THAT SETTLES IT
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15th May 2009, 05:05 PM
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Reps: 110,182,959,778,071,968 (power: 0) | | Originally Posted by AV1611VET TE METHOD:Create the ingredients ex nihilo, then put all the ingredients in a pan and shake the pan until a cake appears.
Note: cake is still in process of being created --- (pan is still being shaken) --- and won't be completed until the moment all the ingredients are burned up with "fervent heat", and a new cake is made instantaneously from the ashes.
LITERAL METHOD:Create the cake ex nihilo --- done.
In a battle against strawman, almost anyone can "win"
Last edited by Hespera; 15th May 2009 at 05:12 PM.
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15th May 2009, 05:06 PM
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We have to escape, because it's coming, sir.
The darkness, the never ending darkness.
The terribly terrible cold.
We have to run and run and run.
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15th May 2009, 07:20 PM
| | Legend
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Reps: 205,146,621,849,477,600 (power: 0) | | Originally Posted by AV1611VET TE METHOD:Create the ingredients ex nihilo, then put all the ingredients in a pan and shake the pan until a cake appears.
Note: cake is still in process of being created --- (pan is still being shaken) --- and won't be completed until the moment all the ingredients are burned up with "fervent heat", and a new cake is made instantaneously from the ashes.
Remind what you "literalists" think "very good" means again?
LITERAL METHOD:Create the cake ex nihilo --- done.
No, the literal method would be make a cake, call it perfect, oops, sorry, I mean "very good", complete with magic screw-up-existence fruit flavouring that turns the cake into a nut log of death in hell if tasted. The cake also bizarrely contains several sets of ingredients in it that are several billion years past their sell-by date, yet naturally, as you don't want to run foul of astral health violations (or some reason, I mean, why would an Omnipotent Baker put them in in the first place? But we won't address those awkward questions in this recipe book) you conveniently forget to mention this in your recipe diary, which is incidentally being transcribed by your sous-chefs whose cooking repertoire consists of putting bread in a toaster. And always burning it.
Then a few generations later you drown the nut-log in water that you forgot was hiding either under the crust of the cake, or hovering above the cake, commiting genocide on 99% of your "perfect" ingredients.
Before blowing it in half at the end of days ANYWAY, the same way as the TE cake.
Hey, at least TE returns something cake-like, YEC just returns a soggy mush flavoured with entropy-fruit and corpses.
Rule no. 1 of satire, kids - never try and parody something that is inherently less ridiculous than what you believe 
Edit: I should really turn this into a Youtube sketch.
Last edited by Cabal; 15th May 2009 at 07:37 PM.
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15th May 2009, 08:31 PM
| | SCIENCE CAN TAKE A HIKE
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Reps: 9,223,372,036,854,775,808 (power: 9,223,372,036,856,908) | | Originally Posted by Cabal Remind what you "literalists" think "very good" means again?
Perfect --- which is what it would be if He would have only pronounced it "good" --- and, in fact, it would still be perfect, whether He pronounced it "good" or not. Originally Posted by Cabal Hey, at least TE returns something cake-like...
Except it comes with death as a natural part of its ingredients.
In fact, everyone dies --- no matter what --- not because of something Adam, the cake's first admirer, did --- but because the cake demands it.
It would not have mattered whether Adam tasted something he shouldn't have --- he was born to die.
(I assume you guys think the first human died of natural causes, and wasn't eaten alive by some... oh, wait ... that was a natural death. Nevermind.)
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15th May 2009, 08:43 PM
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Reps: 205,146,621,849,477,600 (power: 0) | | Originally Posted by AV1611VET Perfect --- which is what it would be if He would have only pronounced it "good" --- and, in fact, it would still be perfect, whether He pronounced it "good" or not.
Seeing as we can literally redefine words, I say "six days" means 4.6 billion years - you should have no problem with this.
*prepares to watch the backpedalling* Except it comes with death as a natural part of its ingredients.
In fact, everyone dies --- no matter what --- not because of something Adam, the cake's first admirer, did --- but because the cake demands it.
It would not have mattered whether Adam tasted something he shouldn't have --- he was born to die.
A man created by a God that knows his every chosen action and then places a fruit tree (whose fruit kills him) that he knows the man will take and eat from is also born to die; just as an existence which contains a mechanism for the introduction of evil isn't a perfect one, no matter how obscure the mechanism is - which if you read the words "very good" literally, you would realise.  |
15th May 2009, 08:46 PM
|  | The Moon is a reflection of the MorningStar
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Reps: 56,734,881,133,185,528 (power: 56,734,881,133,195) | | Originally Posted by Toclafane can't think of what to say that isn't a violation.
lol you too? ;p |
15th May 2009, 08:47 PM
| | SCIENCE CAN TAKE A HIKE
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Reps: 9,223,372,036,854,775,808 (power: 9,223,372,036,856,908) | | Originally Posted by Cabal Seeing as we can literally redefine words, I say "six days" means 4.6 billion years - you should have no problem with this.
*prepares to watch the backpedalling*
A man created by a God that knows his every chosen action and then places a fruit tree (whose fruit kills him) that he knows the man will take and eat from is also born to die; just as an existence which contains a mechanism for the introduction of evil isn't a perfect one, no matter how obscure the mechanism is - which if you read the words "very good" literally, you would realise.
Here's the kicker --- whose fault is it that he is going to die?
If you say it's God's fault --- you can keep your cake.
(You can keep it anyway.)
__________________ GOD SAID IT -- THAT SETTLES IT
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