Please meet him with a few of your friends or even your Mom for your safety regardless if you know him from a friend,if he respects you he will understand.I hope your meet up goes great.....As for looks,as long as he treats you with respect and he has good hygene and clean stylish clothing,looks do fade.And most men get better looking with age while women lose there looks..Sounds like a nice guy
Watch "Beauty and the Beast" a few times. The story is not just about looks but about redemption. Then realize that we are all beasts till the Lord redeems us and we're molded into the image of Jesus. His beauty is on the inside, the only place it matters.
Im an 18 year old girl, and a month back, me and another 18 yo christian guy formed a strong friendship over facebook via constant emailing and chatting. We have become very close and his personality is ideal for me.
We have strong feelings for each other and have decided to meet up to get to know each other better. (This is purely for marriage potentially, we're not playing around). However I have seen his pictures and (no offence to him at all) he is not so good looking (below average).
My sister saw his photos and came to me protesting, saying 'You're so beautiful you could do so much better' and telling me he looks 'very very bad' and stuff.
I don't know what to do guys?! Do I meet him and give it a go, or find another good christian guy who looks average at least? Looks aren't important, yes, but when the person is considerably below average...well.....
Thanks in advance!! God Bless
I didn't like my eldest daughter's boyfriend initially because she is so gorgeous and he wasn't. Well, there were other factors. But, he sticks by her, actually treats her like a queen. Drives her around, does anything she says. They have been together awhile. What can I say?
And he actually isn't ugly, just not stunning as she is.
The biggest thing people get into in our society tends to be problems with weight. That can be lost or gained. Guys can beef up or lose excess weight. That is temporary. Also people can not get right hair cuts or know how to dress and such. That also can change.
Otherwise, apart from those basics, people tend to be pretty decent looking and truly "ugly" people are very far and few between. Relationships definitely are about hearts, not looks.
Only remaining concern I would have is: is he married? Because I could see where someone might say something else to cover that up.
Unfortunately, people lie and can be charming online or even in person. That is the main danger.
Claiming one's self is "ugly" could be a way to make someone think, "Oh that is the drawback to this person"... when there is really far worse problems underlying.
So, don't be naive.
But, don't judge someone because they are "ugly" either.
Also, it's worth noting that some people do not photograph well for whatever reason and you might be surprised.
I know this is true, especially for me, and I hate it so much. If you saw most of my pictures you would probobly think less of me in that regard than you do of him, I look nothing at all like I do in my pictures. One girl who saw my picture said she thought I was ugly, but when she saw me in person she went over to my mom and emphatically said I was hot. So give him a chance and meet him in person, although I would definitely agree with the others who said to go with a few friends, just to be safe. And I would not say it is shallow of you to not want to be with someone because of physical appearance because that is a big part of that kind of relationship is the attraction, and if attraction and looks were completely unimportant in this regard, God would not have even made us with the capacity to be attracted, or with all the diverse looks each one of us has. Obviously, looks are not everything, and looks should be secondary to godliness, you should always concern yourself first with godly character and then with physical attraction. So if there are two equally godly men and one is more atrractive to you, obviously the one you're more atrracted to would be the better choice. But again, give the guy a chance and see how things go.
__________________ "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55:8-9)
It is not good to have zeal without knowledge, nor to be hasty and miss the way.
A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions.
(Proverbs 18:2, 19:2)
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