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  #1  
Old 11th December 2008, 05:46 PM
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Ordained Minister after divorce and an affair- allowable?

I have a good friend who is an ordain minister in his Southern Baptist church. I read some of the requirements of being an elder. I assume you'll need to be an elder or perhaps elder and minister have the same requirements. I'm wondering if a person can be forgiven and become an ordained minister after a divorce many years ago and had a serious affair which has been exposed and dealt with his wife.
I believe I read that elders and other important officials in churches should not be a divorced person and been in a affair.
Personally, If I wanted to have serious discussion and consultation, I would rather trust a person who hasn't been divorced and is somewhat followed the bible's guidelines to be a minister. How can a divorced consult another person in marriage? My question here is: What does the Bible say about the requirements of being an ordained minister?
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Old 11th December 2008, 08:56 PM
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Scripture is very clear about the office of overseer/bishop/elder (depending on the translation)

The saying is trustworthy: If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. 2Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, 5for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for Godís church? 6He must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil. 7 outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace, intoMoreover, he must be well thought of by a snare of the devil.


As far as a divorced person becoming a pastor is concerned - I may well not speak for the majority here - but IMO, if the affair & divorce occurred before he was regenerate/converted then I would be more inclined to not count that against him - after all, we're new beings in Christ. However, if it occurred after his conversion - then he should not be allowed in a position of leadership over a church, Scripture is quite clear in that regard.
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  #3  
Old 12th December 2008, 08:15 AM
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Originally Posted by edb19 View Post
. . . As far as a divorced person becoming a pastor is concerned - I may well not speak for the majority here - but IMO, if the affair & divorce occurred before he was regenerate/converted then I would be more inclined to not count that against him - after all, we're new beings in Christ. However, if it occurred after his conversion - then he should not be allowed in a position of leadership over a church, Scripture is quite clear in that regard.
I think he grew up as a christian and must have been converted long before he divorced. He remarried a divorced woman. As far as the affair goes, I believe the affair happened near the time I was invited to his Sunday school classes, many years ago. He was the teacher of that class. I was a guest visitor and he taught teen kids and the subject that day was a story in the old testament. I'll ask when he got converted. I'll be back....

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Old 13th December 2008, 03:41 AM
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If we accept that there can be total absolution of sins comitted before conversion but not for after, we begin going down a dangerous theological road. I'm not sure whether true repentance from divorce and affair can requalify one for eldership, but I don't believe that whether it was before or after conversion changes the issue.
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Old 13th December 2008, 10:45 AM
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Originally Posted by Epiphoskei View Post
If we accept that there can be total absolution of sins comitted before conversion but not for after, we begin going down a dangerous theological road. I'm not sure whether true repentance from divorce and affair can requalify one for eldership, but I don't believe that whether it was before or after conversion changes the issue.
I'm certainly not saying that there's absolution for sins before conversion as opposed to those that occur after. But based on "He must not be a recent convert" I feel we should look at their life as a convert. Because we're all "totally depraved" prior to regeneration none would meet the requirements for eldership.
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Old 13th December 2008, 11:14 AM
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Originally Posted by edb19 View Post

As far as a divorced person becoming a pastor is concerned - I may well not speak for the majority here - but IMO, if the affair & divorce occurred before he was regenerate/converted then I would be more inclined to not count that against him - after all, we're new beings in Christ. However, if it occurred after his conversion - then he should not be allowed in a position of leadership over a church, Scripture is quite clear in that regard.
This is my line of thinking as well. But from reading the other posts on this thread it looks like the Pastor involved doesn't fit this category. Though "growing up as a Christian" doesn't mean that you necessarily are one.

The tough part of this though - is how on earth is the guy going to support his family if all he has done in life is be a "pastor?" Everybody's knee jerk reaction is of course - "get another job!" But what should be done in the interim? Is it the responsibility of the church to meet the financial needs of the family until the "fallen" Pastor can do so? Or what if the Pastor leave his wife and kids? Should the church support them? I believe it should - what do you all think?
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Old 13th December 2008, 11:48 AM
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excellent question Behe

and yes, if the church is removing a man from the position of elder/pastor because of his failure to meet the Scriptural standard then I do think it would be appropriate for the church to support him and his family for a predetermined period of time
if the pastor left his wife then it is absolutely necessary for the church to support his family as they should any other widow and orphan
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Old 13th December 2008, 06:26 PM
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Originally Posted by edb19 View Post
Scripture is very clear about the office of overseer/bishop/elder (depending on the translation)

The saying is trustworthy: If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. 2Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, 5for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for Godís church? 6He must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil. 7 outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace, intoMoreover, he must be well thought of by a snare of the devil.


As far as a divorced person becoming a pastor is concerned - I may well not speak for the majority here - but IMO, if the affair & divorce occurred before he was regenerate/converted then I would be more inclined to not count that against him - after all, we're new beings in Christ. However, if it occurred after his conversion - then he should not be allowed in a position of leadership over a church, Scripture is quite clear in that regard.
Originally Posted by edb19 View Post
I'm certainly not saying that there's absolution for sins before conversion as opposed to those that occur after. But based on "He must not be a recent convert" I feel we should look at their life as a convert. Because we're all "totally depraved" prior to regeneration none would meet the requirements for eldership.
Originally Posted by edb19 View Post
excellent question Behe

and yes, if the church is removing a man from the position of elder/pastor because of his failure to meet the Scriptural standard then I do think it would be appropriate for the church to support him and his family for a predetermined period of time
if the pastor left his wife then it is absolutely necessary for the church to support his family as they should any other widow and orphan
I agree with all of this. And if he truly is repentant, he should be willing to step down from leadership as that is facing the consequence of his actions.
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Old 13th December 2008, 08:56 PM
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While we're on this subject, Can one be an ordained minister that doesn't have kids. I ask this because I don't have kids. I have one wife as well. I'm wondering about those that don't have a wife or kids. It seems some Bible quotes talk about having a wife and children on subjects about eldership or ministering. The Baptist minister, Nelson Price, who married us, stepped down when he got divorced. Baptist Charles Stanley didn't step down when he got divorce. I brought him up and a friend of mine said he didn't remarry so he is allowed to remain a preacher

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Old 13th December 2008, 09:00 PM
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Originally Posted by desmalia View Post
I agree with all of this. And if he truly is repentant, he should be willing to step down from leadership as that is facing the consequence of his actions.
Wow! How do I kindly bring that up to this guy? What do I say, "Hey! You gotta step down man! You ain't posed to be preaching up there! Get back on the pew".

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