Prayer

-How do you pray?

-When you pray, do you get any signs or feelings that it was heard? What feelings do you get when you pray?

I asked this in another part of the forum, but nobody seems to want to talk about prayer there, despite it being a religious board.

I used to pray, and tried all sorts of different strategies, but it never seems to "work" for me. I also tried meditation. I do not get any sort of feeling at all, and it just feels like I'm talking to myself, and that's what I am becoming to think is happening when I pray. Because of how useless it feels, it has become almost impossible for me to say any genuine prayer.

Any tips or suggestions?

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I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes I pray very sincerely and I feel like God was definitely listening, but other times it's like I'm just wasting my breath. This might sound weird, but I started to pray that God will help me be sincere in my praying and it works. It also helps to pray with the least amount of distractions as possible. I hope this helps.

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May the holes in your net be no larger than the fish in it !

Thanks. It does help to hear other people know what I mean.

I do not think it is weird that you pray for help to be more sincere in praying, because I have done the same thing. I can't say that it worked for me, though.

I also try to limit distractions; that is surely good advice. I try to pray in the dark and alone. Praying in a group doesn't seem to work- I just feel awkward and keep waiting until it is over.

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I pray in different ways..sometimes I just think my prayers, sometimes I say them outloud, sometimes I write them, sometimes words escape me so I just cry or pull a "God, please" and that's it. Other times I sing.

I don't always get a feeling when i pray...but there are times I do. Sometimes I feel peace after I pray..

but a connection with God isn't based on a feeling...as nice as it is to have those feeligns that He is really there hearing you...it's not based on that.

I think a lot of times the feeling with prayer comes when you realize it has been answered, whether in the way you hoped it to be or not..

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"I have discovered, ladies and gentlemen, that Jesus is Lord of all, or He isn't Lord at all. I've come to believe folks, that He's either your high priority, or He's not even in the list....Want to ask you, friend, when are you going to go all out for Jesus?"
- Stephen Manley

Why would we hesitate? The God of the universe has literally given us, laid out for us a banquet for the soul, to partake and to feast upon His very person, to know Him, the King of the universe, intimately, to discover the inheritance of heaven, all the power, all the grace, all the glory. It's there waiting to be had, and we hesitate.
- Eric Ludy

A true prayer life begins at the place of anguish...Your heart begins to cry out, Oh God, Your name is being blasphemed. The Holy Spirit's being mocked. The enemy is out trying to destroy the testimony of the Lord's faithfulness and something has to be done.
- David Wilkerson

I'm with you on the praying in groups thing. I just can't do it, it feels false and shallow. I can never think clearly when I have to pray in groups, so I always have to think about things before hand. Don't really like it.

Prayer is the most important thing ever. No, really...EVER. Christ actually made the statement that we would accomplish more than he ever did (John 14:12) through prayer, once he sent the Father's spirit to us.

I've found there are different ways to pray - praying in the classical sense isn't the only right way. Prayer can become stronger or weaker based on how close you are to God to begin with. In that sense, I guess its like everything else, the more heartfelt and the more often you do it, the easier it becomes. Also, the more heartfelt the prayer, the more sincere, the more effective it seems to be.

The first thing I do is to take myself out of "my" world, and place myself outside of His. This is where the meditation comes in, because if I haven't been practicing my meditation, my mind will race and I'll never get beyond this part. After this, I'll always concentrate on Christ, remembering that he's the "gate" I have to go through to get to God. After that is settled in my own spirit, I will look for that piece of me that I know isn't me, the Holy Spirit, in my heart. That can take anywhere from a few minutes to half an hour. I will try to cover myself in this, and then approach God in prayer.

I know that sounds complicated, but really all I'm doing is cutting out distractions and focusing on my prayer. I know I have to depend on the Spirit for the strength to my prayers, and for the guidance as well. A lot of times, it'll lead me to pray for something I didn't set out to pray for, but which I actually needed to pray for. About 90% of the time, this is for other people I've forgotten about.

Well, this is kinda how I pray, so...

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In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it. -John 1:3

This is the testimony: God has given us eternal life, and that life is in his son. He who has the son has life; he who does not have the son does not have life. -1 John 5:11

Say the Lord's prayer before you pray. Jesus said to say it. It goes like this 'Dear heavenly Father, hallowed be your name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven, give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors, and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil for yours is the power and glory of the kingdom of heaven.'

I always say that before I say anything to God. You are hallowing your prayer by saying the pray that Jesus said to say. To me it opens a connection with God.

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Without God everything is meaningless.

John 15
26"When the Counselor comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who goes out from the Father, he will testify about me. 27And you also must testify, for you have been with me from the beginning."

Religion is testimony. The Holy Spirit testifies of Lord Jesus, and we testify of the Holy Spirit.

What kind of signs do you get that it has been answered?

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Thanks to everyone who spent time to answer.

I've noticed that some of the advice consists of things I've already tried, but that's my fault because I didn't really give any information about what kind of prayer strategies I have unsuccessfully tried. So, I'll provide some background so people might be able to offer more specific advice.

For a long time I believed in the existence of God, but never was really raised with any specific beliefs so I was kind of an “open theist”. I spent a lot of time learning about the major world religions and reading some of their scriptures. Being an American, I was most familiar with Christianity so I started there.

When I was young, I just said the prayers I knew. As I got older, I pretty much did more “open” prayer where I just kind of talked to God. I told him my problems, asked him what things I could work on, asked what advice I need, prayed for other people, and my desires (non-matieral things).

Eventually, though, prayer got harder and harder to do and my belief in a god’s existence was declining. I was very depressed and this was making it worse.

Some Christians told me that God hasn’t heard any of my prayers because I didn’t say them “in the name of Jesus”, so I tried that and my belief still kept declining.

Then they told me that the problem is that I didn’t truly believe in the divinity of Jesus, so even if I say them in the name of Jesus, it won’t help because I don’t actually believe in Christianity specifically. They also said to make sure I pray for forgiveness of sins before I pray.

So, I spent time talking to God and asking him what the correct religion was and asked him to guide me towards the truth. I also started prays by asking for forgiveness for mistakes. I brought up Bible passages like the one about knocking and having the door answered and asked him if he would open the door.

Then I reconsidered the Bible passage where Jesus says not to babble like pagans and say so many words, so I figured maybe God didn’t answer my prayers because he didn’t want me to say so much. So, I just said the Lord’s Prayer and nothing else for a while. Still nothing.

Then I considered that maybe God was communicating and I wasn’t listening. I went back to a more “open” style of prayer where I just try to tell God things, but I kept them short and would just sit in silence for a while trying to pay attention to any thoughts that came to me and nothing seemed to happen.

A went and talked to a Catholic priest and he told me that because I genuinely want to talk to God, it will happen. But, over a few months, I my belief in a god’s existence decreased more and more until my belief was basically nonexistent.

I still tried some prayers, so I asked to be given more faith but my faith was still non-existent. A non-religious person I know sarcastically referenced the biblical passage about how only God can draw people to himself, and said that I probably am just not a member of the elect like Calvinists teach. I never really believed it but it bothered me for some time.

A Buddhist group on my campus gave me basics for meditation, and I researched things on it, but I couldn’t get that to be beneficial at all either.

Some Christians said I might not have been humble enough. I also overheard a Muslim pointing out that people should pray in a prostate position. So, I tried praying on my knees or like some Muslims do by putting their head to the ground.

I gave up for a long time because I literally couldn’t say a prayer. I was always getting the realization that I’m not talking to anyone but my self. Every now and then I would try but it wouldn’t work. Some Christians say that God comes to people, not the other way around. So I assumed that maybe over time, God would come to me. That hasn't happened, though, as far as I can tell.

That was longer than I intended, but that’s what I tried. Maybe now that I've said what I've already tried, people can target things I've done incorrectly or something.

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A summary for those who don't want to read through that long, poorly structured post.

1. I tried talking to God directly.
2. I tried saying only the Lord's prayer and nothing else.
3. I tried saying my prayers in the name of Jesus.
4. I prayed for more faith, because mine was lacking.
5. I prayed to be put on the path towards the truth about God and the correct religion.
6. I tried praying short prayers and then sitting in silence trying to open myself up as much as possible for communication.
7. I tried makings sure I always asked for forgiveness of mistakes before I pray.
8. I tried various combinations of the above.
9. I tried making sure I was humble before I pray and that I pray in a very humble position.
10. I tried Buddhist meditation.
11. I tried not praying, and waiting for God to unexpectedly enter my life.

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Originally Posted by Penumbra

What kind of signs do you get that it has been answered?

Depends on the situation...

sometimes it's just something like one time I was seriously struggling money wise..and I prayed about it. (Not in the God, give me money way, but in the God, please help this work out somehow no matter what way)...and then a mentor of sorts of mine (from CF actually..she's fantastic ) offered to help me.

Other times, it's only in hindsight that I see the prayers were answered... Like, when I was in high school..I was mostly agnostic/atheist with a hint of God-if-you're-there-help-ist when things were tough...and my brother Erik was having a rough time of it (there's a LOT to that story so I won't go there ..but suffice it to say, it was brutally ugly)...and I remember my dad asking me what God would have to do to prove Himself to me. And I said, He needs to do a miracle, he needs to help Erik....well, my brother ending up killing himself...and months later, when I became a Christian, I realized God had did just that...what more of a miracle could God do for my brother than to greet him in heaven where he wouldn't be in pain anymore?

There are many more examples...but I won't post them all here

Originally Posted by Penumbra

Then I considered that maybe God was communicating and I wasn’t listening.

Perhaps this is a good answer...Not saying that you are a bad listener..it's just sometimes recognizing God's answers is not the easiest thing to do.

I went back to a more “open” style of prayer where I just try to tell God things, but I kept them short and would just sit in silence for a while trying to pay attention to any thoughts that came to me and nothing seemed to happen.

What exactly do you think you should be feeling when you pray?

I gave up for a long time because I literally couldn’t say a prayer. I was always getting the realization that I’m not talking to anyone but my self. Every now and then I would try but it wouldn’t work. Some Christians say that God comes to people, not the other way around.

The way I see it, it's both...

So I assumed that maybe over time, God would come to me. That hasn't happened, though, as far as I can tell.

No offense meant by this...but perhaps that's the problem ..like I said before...it can be hard to recognize God...

How do you expect/or imagine that God should come to you? Are you waiting for some huge miracle of sorts? Or would you accept more subtle things?

And, for the record...I'll be praying for you..I know it can be a difficult thing

__________________
"I have discovered, ladies and gentlemen, that Jesus is Lord of all, or He isn't Lord at all. I've come to believe folks, that He's either your high priority, or He's not even in the list....Want to ask you, friend, when are you going to go all out for Jesus?"
- Stephen Manley

Why would we hesitate? The God of the universe has literally given us, laid out for us a banquet for the soul, to partake and to feast upon His very person, to know Him, the King of the universe, intimately, to discover the inheritance of heaven, all the power, all the grace, all the glory. It's there waiting to be had, and we hesitate.
- Eric Ludy

A true prayer life begins at the place of anguish...Your heart begins to cry out, Oh God, Your name is being blasphemed. The Holy Spirit's being mocked. The enemy is out trying to destroy the testimony of the Lord's faithfulness and something has to be done.
- David Wilkerson