Right now I am having a debate about the unequally-yoked issue in the single forums. The singles there argue that marrying a non-believer will lead to alot of hurt....since the spouse does not share faith with you
Is this true for you? Or are you really happy with your marriage to your spouse?
I know it caused my wife alot of unescasary heartache and pain until God got me straitened out.
__________________ "A true opium of the people is a belief in nothingness after death, the huge solace of thinking that for our betrayals, greed, cowardice, murders we are not going to be judged. The Marxist creed has now been inverted. The true opium of modernity is the belief that there is no God, so that humans are free to do precisely as they please."
Nobel Prize winner Czeslaw Milosz
"I can almost forgive the palistinians for killing our children. I can never forgive them for making us kill theirs." Golda Meir
To Alexander 1982 I am the wife of an unsaved husband and all I can tell you is yes I am most of the times happy with my marriage but one has to be in order to follow Christ example. There are so many differences between me and my husband and there are many times when i am unhappy with my circumstances it even can get overwhelming at times but I know Christ has a plan for my husbands salvation so I just deal with it on a daily basis I would not recommend your friends willing mary an unbeliever though I was not saved when I married my husband but I know that he is still the one Christ placed me with for a purpose any other ? feel free to pm me!
Yes, it does lead to alot of hurt if you and your spouse are not of the same faith. I was not saved when my husband and I married 14 years ago. I was saved 7 years ago (Praise God) but it has caused alot of pain and heartache in our marriage. I have faith that God will get a hold of him someday. I would certainly not recommend anyone marrying someone who doesn't believe like they do.
Right now I am having a debate about the unequally-yoked issue in the single forums. The singles there argue that marrying a non-believer will lead to alot of hurt....since the spouse does not share faith with you
Is this true for you? Or are you really happy with your marriage to your spouse?
I am absolutely amazingly head-over-heels happy with my spouse He was raised Christian, and he has a tendency to refer to himself as a "non-practicing Christian" -- problem with that is when I've asked him over the time we've known each other, what he believes, his answers are much more obscure; He says it isn't that he doesn't believe, just that he doesn't practice nor has much interest in persuing God actively. This pretty much puts us in the unevenly-yoked category, rather than unequally yoked.
He is the most respectful individual of other people's beliefs that I have ever had the pleasure of meeting, and that to me is more important than any belief in anything. I believe any two people can truly be amazingly happy if they have true respectfor each other!
__________________
This account is now inactive
(I have an older account I'm back to using)
Current account name: BeyondAshes
<3
Last edited by Blue Impulse; 4th January 2009 at 12:43 AM.
Reason: spelling
I married a most excellent man not four months ago.
He is a devout Hindu and that gave pause for thought, consultation with those who loved me, and prayer.
I would marry an atheist before a wishy-washy Christian or a rigid, cocksure Christian. I would marry a devout man of another faith before marrying an atheist. Best of all a devout Christian who walks a path very close to mine.
If I could word process the perfect husband, I certainly would have gotten right onto the cut-and-paste thing. Who wouldn't?
Yes, I have a lifetime of treading a tightrope between heresy and respect for my husband's faith. Safest to follow St. Paul's advice and not get married at all.
I would not recommend marrying out of faith without considerable thought and prayer.
Though it's early on, my husband and I have faced some pretty serious challenges...none to do with religion or with character flaws...all to do with family, medical, and just plain human fumbles. The manner in which we solved them gives us confidence for the future.
I am somewhat happy in our marriage, but it has been a struggle.
When we married, my wife was a lukewarm christian, I was an admitted deist. We knew each other, and dated for a few years and had a year engagement. My beliefs were not an issue when we decided to get married. 18 years ago, she became a strict, fundamentalist born again christian. Her scripture study, church activities and social life was totally focused on fundamental christianity. I was witnessed to in a combative and confrontational way for the majority of the past 18 years. The past 5 years have been less intense, but her mission remains the same. To beat me into submission to her style of christianity. She does sometimes revert back to her confrontaional tactics, stating that I am the enemy (Matt 10 34-36). She has read me that verse and looked me straight in the eye with such contempt, that I felt I was in the room with a stranger.
After being most supportive of her quest for spiritual enlightenment, that was the last straw. I am respectful of anyone's beliefs and still am, but I no longer will sit back and take the kind of brow beating that I tolerated for so many years. Now, when I am "witnessed" to I leave the room.
It has subsided dramatically, but the goal is the same; to make me believe as she. The tactic has been a dismal failure, and what is has done make me realize that people (no matter how well and how long you know them) change. It has been one of the biggest disappointments in my life, as I have been judged by how I declare myself as a person, verses how I am as a human being. She has stated that I live more a christian life than some of her christian friends, but that makes no difference, I am still the enemy and will be treated as such. Amazing......
Your post made me so sad. Some couples have it so hard---unequally yoked or not.
It strikes me that this is not a matter of religion as such but of something much deeper--a matter of one partner losing perspective and becoming a fanatic.
It could just as well be all for a cause such as the environment---that if you don't immerse yourself as fully as she, then you have no social responsibilty. Or she might make your home a shelter for cats with a no-kill plicy, and when you complain about being over-run by cats, you have no feeling for animals. Or that you don't spend every waking hour picketing an abortion clinic---have you no reverence for life of the unborn?
What is glaringly missing in your marriage is mutual respect.
It strikes me that your wife's approach is above all, counter productive. Ask yourself, just how likely is she to win souls for Christ with the approach she has used with you? If you were not married you simply would walk away, right? (In fact that is just what you are doing, but just to the other room)
I think you would best consider counselling. If she won't particpate, then go for yourself. You can't make her change, but you can arrive at what is the best policy for you.
Again, I am sorry to read of your situation. Again, I think this has less to do with religion than your wife losing perspective and becoming fanatical---the fundamentalist religion being more or less incidental.
He was raised Christian, and he has a tendency to refer to himself as a "non-practicing Christian" -- problem with that is when I've asked him over the time we've known each other, what he believes, his answers are much more obscure; He says it isn't that he doesn't believe, just that he doesn't practice nor has much interest in persuing God actively. This pretty much puts us in the unevenly-yoked category, rather than unequally yoked. 
Linear Mode
