Is remarriage sin for devorced Christian?

I've been puzzling over this too. I was married for four years to a man who made my life miserable. Every day he criticised and belittled me, constantly complained and berated me. Nothing I could do was ever good enough for him. My housekeeping skills were not good enough - he would take things out of my hands and do them himself, or later I would see him re-doing what I had done. His own mother told me that when he was around she felt afraid to cook or do anything, because he would always have to "correct" what she had done. Without going into any further detail, he was a very "prickly" man to be around and a very unloving and unaccepting husband. Eventually I felt I couldn't live with him anymore and I divorced him. He began seeing other women before he had even moved out of our home but eventually settled down with the lady who is now his third wife. I lived alone for almost 2 years after our divorce, very upset because all I had ever wanted in my life was to be married and spend my life making my husband happy.

When I met my 2nd husband, he was in the process of divorcing his first wife. They had been married for 18 years and according to my husband she had behaved to him much the same as my first husband had behaved to me. She was by nature a "cold fish" and refused him any sort of affection or physical contact for most of their marriage. In addition to this, she ran their home like a hospital of which she was the boss. He was allowed no opinion about anything - hers was the only opinion allowed.

So he divorced her. She never expressed any sorrow about him leaving, asked him to come back or said she loved him or missed him. She was angry and indignant, that was all.

I believe marriage should be taken very seriously so naturally I was puzzled about my first marriage, his marriage and our subsequent marriage. In God's eyes, was I still married to my horrible ex-husband, or my husband to his cold and cruel ex-wife? I should add that I was my first husband's second wife. He and his first wife were married for 10 years. He said that for the 1st eight years they were happy, then they were not, possibly because she wanted children and he didn't. They agreed to divorce and later, he met me.

My husband, too, was not the first husband of his first wife. She had been married before, and her first marriage broke down for the same reason her second did - her coldness towards her husband.

So I thought, well if God says divorce and remarriage is not OK, then surely that means both of our first marriages were not valid in His eyes and we were free to marry each other?

Then last Sunday we had a visiting preacher who talked about divorce and remarriage. He read out the verse where Jesus says a man may only divorce his wife for marital unfaithfulness. This preacher said that marital unfaithfulness didn't only mean sexual adultery, but could include physical and mental cruelty. I've heard this preached before and I do believe we both had the right to end our marriages as our respective spouses had failed to honour them.

We were married in our own church by our minister, with the church full to capacity with family and friends. We feel our marriage is blessed by God in a way that I have certainly never experienced before. I believe God can and does bless subsequent marriages in certain circumstances, but at the same time, I believe divorce should only take place when every effort has been made to save the marriage. This was the case with both our previous marriages - we had each tried to talk things over with our former spouses, who refused to listen or work through difficulties.

I do hope your friend will look at hunterman's site as it looks very helpful and I pray God will bless her. I am sure that God wants her to be happy in the future and that this will include a happy marriage to a good husband.

Heres some bible texts which say that one shouldnt divorce and remarry.
its a hard job taking this on board and living life like this, but god sees all and wont let us be tested beyond out limits. God doesnt let anything happen thats unecessary.

1 corinthians 7:39 A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.

matthew 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

romans 7:3 So then, if she marries another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress, even though she marries another man.

Malachi 2:16 For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away

1 Corinthians 7:10,11 ...Let not the wife depart from her husband... and let not the husband put away his wife.

Are you aware that those verses had a specific context and actually don't mean what we have been told they do?

John
NZ

This one thing I know. God absolutely, without question, has blessed me in my second marriage. Quote any scripture you want, debate context, but in the end I cannot deny the hand of God in my current marriage and his abundant blessings on it.

I agree, absolutely 100% with this because I have the same situation. God blesses us so much, it's amazing. When we were getting married (six years ago now) there were people who knew my husband from before and they had the nerve to tell him he was going to go to hell, and that also God would make our lives miserable here on earth, that everything would fall apart between us, all that kind of nonsense. They are/were so wrong. The love between us and the bond we have grows stronger all the time and we FEEL the Lord's presence and blessings shining down on us.

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sorry, I didnt realize this was an OLD thread

Originally Posted by ddisciple

Heres some bible texts which say that one shouldnt divorce and remarry.

no, heres some one liners that some like to push on others, not unlike my demanding money from you then giving verses where Jesus says to give to EVERY man who asks.
You do precisely the same thing because you do not comprehend the concept of context.

its a hard job taking this on board and living life like this, but god sees all and wont let us be tested beyond out limits. God doesnt let anything happen thats unecessary.

really ?
So YOUR view is that if a woman has the hell beat out of her then God let it happen because it WAS 'necessary'.
Im sure that will go over well when you stand before Him on judgment day, gent.

1 corinthians 7:39 A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.

READERS SEE->Click->>> "Bound by Law" (Romans 7, 1 Cor 7:39)

matthew 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

READERS SEE->Click->>> Matthew 5:32 - "Causes her to commit adultery"

romans 7:3 So then, if she marries another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress, even though she marries another man.

READERS SEE->Click->>> "Bound by Law" (Romans 7, 1 Cor 7:39)

Malachi 2:16 For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away

Huh.
And yet GOD GAVE a writ of divorce

1 Corinthians 7:10,11 ...Let not the wife depart from her husband... and let not the husband put away his wife.

READERS SEE->Click->>> "Let not man Put Asunder" vs "let the unbeliever depart"
READERS SEE->Click->>>"Remain Unmarried or reconcile” vs "not in bondage"


Anything else, d ?

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Originally Posted by AMOG

This one thing I know. God absolutely, without question, has blessed me in my second marriage. Quote any scripture you want, debate context, but in the end I cannot deny the hand of God in my current marriage and his abundant blessings on it.

Amen.
I didnt even choose my present wife. By the time I had two failed marriages I decided that it was best to not remarry. I even tried to use this godless doctrine that ddisciple pushes to try to convince myself that I couldnt remarry.
That didnt last long, however....no getting around the facts that we arent condemned to celibacy as some demonic doctrines profess.

I had chosen poorly twice and rushed into marriage when I shouldnt have.
When I finally stepped back and let GOD choose I ended up with the wife who is perfect for me.

If Id only known way back when what I do now.
.

Yes, it's almost amusing if it weren't so stupid. For one thing, even if it is a sin, which I don't believe it is, but if it were does he, or anyone, actually think that what Jesus did on the Cross for us won't cover this?? I mean, with all the aggregious sins in the world, THIS is the one that's some sort of unforgivable horror? We have people in the world that rape and murder CHILDREN, and there's abortion, just to name a few. I think that's preposterous to think that someone is divorced and remarried is going to stand out among those people and be the ones who are not forgiven.

In addition, there are other sins that are mentioned that people will get thrown into hell for. How about lust, for one. I don't believe that the OP, or any man alive for that matter, has never looked at a woman with lust. Let's go on to self righteousness, being judgmental, hypocritical, and how about liars, the greedy, the gluttonous, selfish??? Those are all mentioned as people who will not spend eternity with our Father.

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Originally Posted by dorig59

Yes, it's almost amusing if it weren't so stupid. For one thing, even if it is a sin, which I don't believe it is, but if it were does he, or anyone, actually think that what Jesus did on the Cross for us won't cover this?? I mean, with all the aggregious sins in the world, THIS is the one that's some sort of unforgivable horror? We have people in the world that rape and murder CHILDREN, and there's abortion, just to name a few. I think that's preposterous to think that someone is divorced and remarried is going to stand out among those people and be the ones who are not forgiven.

Something even more diabolical about the godless error these people push is this...

A man divorces his wife and remarries. Supposedly this is ongoing adultery, right ?
Many of these folks actually believe that if the man were to kill his exwife that God is so bound by legalism that He is literally FORCED to accept this remarriage now since the exwife is now dead.

Of course they'll say that this man will now spend his life in prison, but as far as Gods concerned he can simply repent of murdering his ex and hes good to go with God.

This is so far from the heart of God that its remarkable that anyone would buy into it who KNOWS His word, but dont you know that Ive actually cornered a lot of these folks into finally admitting that they believe that garbage ?

It sort of stinks that we are so bound by rules on forums like this because when we have a little more room to say what needs to be said its VERY easy to expose all sorts of demonic error in these doctrines.
Sadly these folks wont just spill it up front...it has to be drawn out of them in a heated debate which regrettably would break the rules.