We Should Teach Our Teens To Wait Until Marriage For Sex

Revelation1217 · #1 11th July 2008, 04:53 PM

We Should Teach Our Teens To Wait Until Marriage For Sex

Over 50 Percent Of 15 To 19 Year Olds In America Admit To Having Oral Sex:

http://greatmarriagetips.blogspot.co...-teens-to.html

Q2004 · #2 11th July 2008, 04:55 PM

I think it's foolish advice, really. Marriage isn't simply a financial/social/religious contract, and it seems unreasonable to expect people to marry without knowing they were compatible in every way (including sexually) that is important to those getting married.

sidhe · #3 11th July 2008, 05:09 PM

Over 50% admit to having oral sex?

That tells me that less than 50% are lying.

platzapS · #4 11th July 2008, 05:11 PM

I'm not going to teach my kids that. I see nothing inherently wrong with premarital sex, as long as it's consensual and with protection.

LittleNipper · #5 11th July 2008, 05:21 PM

Originally Posted by Q2004

I think it's foolish advice, really. Marriage isn't simply a financial/social/religious contract, and it seems unreasonable to expect people to marry without knowing they were compatible in every way (including sexually) that is important to those getting married.

The most important thing is to know what the person feels and believes. This is not discovered through sex. The reality is that people pretend in order to impress. One needs to get through all the pretense and focus on the motives of that someone one feels drawn to. If all one can do is have sex, a lifetime with such a person will be a bore without it. It is better for the husband and wife to learn together. If either has had more "experience" that one will expect more or the other will imagine more and neither will be content. Find out everything about what that person thinks and then marry that person. The pasture is not greener over the fence..

LittleNipper · #6 11th July 2008, 05:26 PM

Originally Posted by platzapS

I'm not going to teach my kids that. I see nothing inherently wrong with premarital sex, as long as it's consensual and with protection.

I do hope your kids are not girls... and that your boys have a good job.

lawtonfogle · #7 11th July 2008, 05:33 PM

Originally Posted by sidhe

Over 50% admit to having oral sex?

That tells me that less than 50% are lying.

Hey, not all of them are lying.

lawtonfogle · #8 11th July 2008, 05:36 PM

Originally Posted by LittleNipper

The most important thing is to know what the person feels and believes. This is not discovered through sex. The reality is that people pretend in order to impress. One needs to get through all the pretense and focus on the motives of that someone one feels drawn to. If all one can do is have sex, a lifetime with such a person will be a bore without it. It is better for the husband and wife to learn together. If either has had more "experience" that one will expect more or the other will imagine more and neither will be content.

Not quite true. Some people could have a 'teaching' attitude about them, and thus find it better if it was this way.

Find out everything about what that person thinks and then marry that person. The pasture is not greener over the fence..

So, basically have a intellectual discussion including a few arguments (of the reasoning kind, not the shouting match kind). Yeah, um... that doesn't quite sound like a date to me. Then again, I personally wouldn't mind this kind of encounter, but many seem to. So many people 'don't like to think', and that becomes a problem when they apply it to major areas of life.

Donkeytron · #9 11th July 2008, 05:37 PM

Originally Posted by lawtonfogle

Hey, not all of them are lying.

Thats right, nerds occasionally take surveys too!

DeathMagus · #10 11th July 2008, 05:37 PM

Originally Posted by LittleNipper

The most important thing is to know what the person feels and believes. This is not discovered through sex. The reality is that people pretend in order to impress. One needs to get through all the pretense and focus on the motives of that someone one feels drawn to.

Most certainly. I don't think many would disagree with you. Sex is definitely not the most important part of a marriage, but it is a major part. Since people have a huge variety of sexual desires, drives, etc, it makes sense to check for compatibility in that realm, just as one would check if a potential partner is adventurous (if you like security and playing it safe), dependent (if you're into a more detached relationship), etc.

If all one can do is have sex, a lifetime with such a person will be a bore without it.

This is perhaps the most common misconception that the no-sex crowd has regarding the pro-sex crowd. Most people don't advocate that sex is the only thing a couple can do together. Most don't even think it's the primary thing - they just think it's an important thing.

It is better for the husband and wife to learn together. If either has had more "experience" that one will expect more or the other will imagine more and neither will be content. Find out everything about what that person thinks and then marry that person. The pasture is not greener over the fence..

So someone who loves having sex won't become dissatisfied with someone who prefers it once a month, because they won't imagine that someone else might be like them and want it more often? You can't guarantee sexual compatibility by keeping both parties ignorant of the possibilities. To suggest that seems naïve to me.