What makes a successful marriage?

Putting Christ first in your lives, that's what makes a good marriage

Put God in the centre, the other keys are communication, compassion and looking at how you can serve your spouse rather than how they can serve you..... also, accept YOUR failings, not just your partners!

I think a succesfull marriage has to be built upon the cornerstone, Jesus Christ. On top of that stone should be equality, equally yoked. Add to that Love, character, integrity, repsect, submission, etc, and you will be on the right path.

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Psalm 40: 2
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.

Hi guys. Well, let me tell you, my husband and I have been through some rough times. Honestly, we've talked about divorce on several occasions. We've been married for 6 years now and we've finally forgiven each other for old hurts and are now moving forward together in Christ. I think if WE can make it any couple can. We've only in the last year or so come back around to Christ, making Him the center of our family. And I can not tell you how much better things are now. Other than the obvious Jesus factor, let me give you some insight into what opened my eyes about marriage:

1. FALLING in love and BEING in love are 2 different things (a la Dr. Phil). Yes, it can still be passionate and exciting, but you shouldn't expect that those little butterflies will be there every second of your married life.

2. There will be ups and downs, possibly big ones. My pastor told us he'd recently spoken to a couple together for 50 years and he'd asked them what was the secret of making it work for all those years and the lady said "We just never fell out of love at the same time." This sounds depressing but it's really such a wonderful thing. I can relate to this. Perhaps others will understand this as well.

3. Remember to do the things that made your husband fall for you. I used to bake cookies for my man all the time when we were dating (he was military and, quite often, deployed). I just stopped when I had him around me all the time...not intentionally, I just let it happen. Don't do that, make an effort to make him smile.

4. Most important one, I think. Marriage is not 50/50. If a marriage is going to work, it's got to be a 100% effort on both sides. And if he's not giving his 100%, then you've got to be willing to pick up his slack.

Those are my thoughts based on my experiences. Ask me again in 50 years

Love, Heather

I’m new here, first post, but I thought I would share my two cents. I’ve only been married for just over a year and communication is very important but I know for a fact that my wife and I would not have had made it if we both did not have Christ as the center of our lives. Thanks

A lasting marriage. Well firstly, I think that not only do both parties need to make Christ the essential part of their lives but also to truly commit to their wedding vows.

Before my husband and I were married our pastor took great pains to explain our vows and what they meant as a covenant to God. This of course made us both sit up and listen, and it gave us a deeper connection as a couple. This does not imply however that everything has been smooth. We are only human. Patience should always come first. If you first use this everything else will fall into place...eventually. (haha)

First comes the engagement ring
Then comes the wedding ring
Then comes the suffering.

Heehee! Just Kidding.
Proverbs 31
Ephesians 5
I Corinthians 13

Also it really helps to have someone you have a lot in common with, other than an attraction. Also making sure they truly are sold out to God and put Him first. If they put God first, they will treat you much better than if they put you first. And the most important thing of all: if we want to change the other person, it has to begin by changing ourselves.

Many blessings to you, and good huntin'!

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I've been happily married for 11 years and here's a couple of things to add to the "If I had to do it all over again" theory:
1. Spend lots of time in long discussions regarding our relationship in Christ... God's gifts and purpose, dreams, hopes, etc.
2. Create opportunites for both families to interact and get to know each other.
3. Get to know each other best friends. (Find out what the "real" you is like... we tend to put on our best face while dating/courting.)
4. Lots of pre-marriage counseling. (This was very helpful.)
5. If children are to be part of your family, start training now! (gfi.org is great start!)
6. If I had to do it again... I would! It's been great.

my exact word.......... ty Erin

Center your relationship together around the Eucharist. Remember, a marriage is an icon of Christ and His bride. And the fullness of this relationship is found in the Eucharist.

Peace.

Peter

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"Tradition is the living faith of the dead. Traditionalism is the dead faith of the living." Jaroslav Pelikan