do pastors have a legal right to tell on someone that cuts?

Do pastors have a legal right to tell on someone who was a cutter? My pastor told on me. I didn't think he would break a confidence and tellmy husband that I cut and have mental health problems. Now I don't trust anybody with it. I don't know if I want to confront him either in case he says that legally he had to tell. He said I should be in a state mental hospital, I'm crazy and how can my family put up with me. I thought that counseling stuff was confidential, I wasn't hurting anybody but myself. Now if I cut, I either hide it, say the cat scratched me, or wear long sleeves as long as I don't need stitches. I was trying to get help to stop hurting myself but now I don't know about trusting anybody. I'm not crazy, I work 2 jobs and sometimes things get stressful is all. I'm not bothering anybody.

Thats harsh. I know i was put into a position like that a few months ago, and the friend who was also a leader who came after me when i fled youth umm ended up telling the head pastor for youth. But that may have been cause im only 14, and not only that, left youth without permission. I think that it was a great step in trusting someone and trying to help yourself, and the mistrust now is understandible. I would reccomend just talking to this pastor about. His intentions were obviously in the right place, but it seems he didnt handle it too well at all. This will make it hard, but just ask to talk to him, tell him you feel betrayed, that you trusted him, and he broke that trust, and ask him wether he legally had to tell. Im not too sure about it personally. I know with under 18's, not adults, if serious things are going on in someones life, then theyre legally obliged to help and get help for you, but i know that at my church, especially at youth, the leaders and kids are all really good mates, so we talk about stuff and meet up and talk, or call them when we have a problem and all's well, they dont tell our parents.

Try to work up the courage to talk to this pastor, its very important to you obviously and if you dont you will always wonder and search. So just ask, pray for wisdom in this, pray for strength from the lord, he will help you if you ask.

xx, teffie

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i din't think the would have any kind of obligation as long as you were over the age of 18.

Difficult for you to understand aye!

A Pastor is also similar to a counsellor, and one of the main rules which is legal is if there is any thought or suggestion of harm towards a person or child then it has to be looked into. Not out of spite, but for the persons own welfare. If you were on the opposite end, so a pastor or counsellor what would you do if someone came to you with the same issue, would you leave it and let the person become more ill, or would you direct them to help?

Im-revived

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Ouch! That's hard. They are right there are poeple who are mandated reportors when they feel when a person is in danger from another person or themselves. I'm thinking a pastor whom may be considered a counselor is one of them. That being said there is a lot of gray area with cutting. I mean you are doing something dangerous but not life threatening. So far no one has ever "told" on me. I would have been very upset.

That being said I do not know your pastor or his heart. He may also be very inexperienced at dealing w/ cutting and may have just been error on the side of cautian or overreacted to the situation.

Don't let his inexperience and uncomfortablilty with the topic stop you from getting help. You were so very brave to share in the first place! That's the hardest step. Perhaps another person is in order...a counselor or therapist.


Best of luck.

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"If I stand let me stand on the promise that you will pull me through. If I can't let me fall on the grace that first brought me to you" Rich Mullins

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