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  #1  
Old 23rd June 2005, 06:49 PM
It means 'yellow dog'

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Pastor's wife doesn't attend church

What do you think of a pastor whose wife attends another church? Same denomination, other side of town. She takes the kids to that church and only visits her husband's church when it is having social events involving food, like a spaghetti supper or bake sale.
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Old 23rd June 2005, 07:00 PM
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My sister and her husband pastored different churches in the same area. Since both were pastors, they of course went to different churches. The kids went to dad's church, since mom was an interim specialist, so changed churches every year or so.

There were problems to the extent that I wouldn't recommend it if it could be avoided. I wish my sister had been more involved in her husband's church. If you need more details, you can PM me. I have known several couples who attended different churches, often because each spouse had a different ministry. Another couple I can think of, the wife was children's pastor at one church and the husband was music minister at another church. In most cases it worked out OK, but I think it's usually best if the whole family belongs to the same church.

IIRC, your parents belonged to different churches when you were growing up. If so, you know it can work out, but there are some disadvantages. I think the same thing applies to pastoral families.
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Old 23rd June 2005, 07:11 PM
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Originally Posted by lambslove
What do you think of a pastor whose wife attends another church? Same denomination, other side of town. She takes the kids to that church and only visits her husband's church when it is having social events involving food, like a spaghetti supper or bake sale.
Has the pastor explained to the congregation WHY his wife doesn't attend ?? If he hasn't someone should ask. Sounds kinda fishy to me !


Ray
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Old 23rd June 2005, 07:41 PM
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Originally Posted by lambslove
What do you think of a pastor whose wife attends another church? Same denomination, other side of town. She takes the kids to that church and only visits her husband's church when it is having social events involving food, like a spaghetti supper or bake sale.
One can look at it this way "If a man is unfit to lead his own household, then how can he lead a church?" I think it is Satan through his wife trying to undermine his ability to reach others. Does he teach Scripture? Does he give in to society or to traditions? These are the questions that pertain. Disregard the issue of his wife and, when you see her, tell her in a Christ-like kind manner that she should support her husband.
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Old 23rd June 2005, 08:59 PM
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At my parents church, the pastor's husband doesn't attend church at all. I don't think he's Christian at all. To me, it's a very strange situation, and I can't figure out how she thinks it's ok that her husband isn't Christian/doesn't attend church.

My friend's parents went to different churches. My friend and her mom (and her siblings) came to my church, and her dad went to another church. From what I remember, part of it had to do with having a female pastor. When our church had a male pastor, my friend's dad came to our church sorta regularly. Otherwise, he went to his brother's church (and still does some of the time).

I think it's strange that the pastor's wife would attend a different church of the same denomination. I can understand differences in beliefs causing a couple to attend different churches (although that's not something I'd want to do), but to attend the same denomination... I'm very curious about their reasoning!
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Old 23rd June 2005, 09:30 PM
It means 'yellow dog'

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Originally Posted by Crazy Liz
My sister and her husband pastored different churches in the same area. Since both were pastors, they of course went to different churches. The kids went to dad's church, since mom was an interim specialist, so changed churches every year or so.

There were problems to the extent that I wouldn't recommend it if it could be avoided. I wish my sister had been more involved in her husband's church. If you need more details, you can PM me. I have known several couples who attended different churches, often because each spouse had a different ministry. Another couple I can think of, the wife was children's pastor at one church and the husband was music minister at another church. In most cases it worked out OK, but I think it's usually best if the whole family belongs to the same church.

IIRC, your parents belonged to different churches when you were growing up. If so, you know it can work out, but there are some disadvantages. I think the same thing applies to pastoral families.
I can see that if both are ministers in different churches, it is unavoidable for them to attend different churches. In this case, the wife is not a minister in any church, she just doesn't care for the church her husband pastors and prefers the church she goes to. There would be nothing stopping her from going to the husband's church, she says she just doesn't like the church (meaning the people, the building and the ministries). When we do see her, she's quite stand-offish with most of the members, but will talk for brief periods with some of the women her own age.

And although my parents were of different denominations, they always went to the same church together, they never split up on sundays. As long as my mom lived, my dad went to her church, but after she died, he went back to his original church.
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Old 23rd June 2005, 09:33 PM
It means 'yellow dog'

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Originally Posted by Athanasian Creed
Has the pastor explained to the congregation WHY his wife doesn't attend ?? If he hasn't someone should ask. Sounds kinda fishy to me !


Ray
Yes, he explains that she doesn't care for the church and prefers to attend her own church.
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Old 23rd June 2005, 10:17 PM
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Originally Posted by lambslove
I can see that if both are ministers in different churches, it is unavoidable for them to attend different churches. In this case, the wife is not a minister in any church, she just doesn't care for the church her husband pastors and prefers the church she goes to. There would be nothing stopping her from going to the husband's church, she says she just doesn't like the church (meaning the people, the building and the ministries). When we do see her, she's quite stand-offish with most of the members, but will talk for brief periods with some of the women her own age.

And although my parents were of different denominations, they always went to the same church together, they never split up on sundays. As long as my mom lived, my dad went to her church, but after she died, he went back to his original church.
First when did Baptist start ordaning women as pastors. For a woman can't be the husband of one wife. There is no scripture or example in the Bible to support women pastors.

Second a divided house cannot stand.

Third even if God allowed women to be pastors do you honestly think he would put the husband at one church and his wife at another. I cannot believe God would split a family up. Again there is no scripture or example of any such thing in the Bible. God's way is that a family worship together.

Forth this and other doctrine that is being taught today is the falling away from sound dactrine Paul speaks of in Thesssalonians.
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Old 23rd June 2005, 10:19 PM
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Originally Posted by lambslove
What do you think of a pastor whose wife attends another church? Same denomination, other side of town. She takes the kids to that church and only visits her husband's church when it is having social events involving food, like a spaghetti supper or bake sale.
I wouldn't walk across the streed to hear what he has to say, must less follow his teaching.
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Old 23rd June 2005, 10:26 PM
It means 'yellow dog'

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Originally Posted by MbiaJc
Third even if God allowed women to be pastors do you honestly think he would put the husband at one church and his wife at another. I cannot believe God would split a family up. Again there is no scripture or example of any such thing in the Bible. God's way is that a family worship together.
No, I don't. I don't even think a man should take a pastorate position without the full consent and approval of his wife. I don't think God would call a man to the pastorate without letting the wife know, too. I know of several men that became pastors without the approval and support of their wives and I can honestly say that they are all failures as pastors.

God will not bless a pastorate of a man that doesn't accept his wife's counsel on such a life-altering event. It's not just the man's life that is changed by accepting a pastor position, it's the whole family and no man should be making important decisions like that without his wife's agreement.
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