Intrusive Thoughts

lindsey35atl · Aug 9, 2016

A year and a half ago I had a really bad experience using tarot cards. I was exposed to something very evil, I had a deliverance, but I'm not back to normal. I've had six jobs in the past year, I can't concentrate and these horrible thoughts consume me. It would be so nice to talk to someone who suffers from intrusive thoughts, like a support group. I am very suicidal and depressed, I've lost everything. I feel God has abandoned me and am wondering how he can even exist at this point.

Something4Kate · Aug 30, 2016

Hello @lindsey35atl,

About 2 months ago now I had a similar-ish experience with drugs. While EXTREMELY high I became host to something temporarily. Luckily something else (what I think was a relative) came a got me on my behalf and admonished me for using drugs and being down on myself for the past few years. This was most certainly the most traumatic experience of my life as I'm sure yours was as well.

I am a fledgling in my walk in Christ and still have trouble trusting sometimes. But God is showing me his love through my intrusive thoughts.

We can talk more just message me and perhaps we can exchange phone numbers. Also I and a couple other members of the forum are preparing to start a verse memorization project and you are welcome to join.

I love you but not as much (never as much) as God. Hang in there please!

lindsey35atl · Aug 30, 2016

I used to do a lot of ecstasy maybe that's why I'm having the thoughts. I read in one of you post you contacted a pastor via Skype, was it Bob Larson?

Something4Kate · Aug 30, 2016

lindsey35atl said:
I used to do a lot of ecstasy maybe that's why I'm having the thoughts. I read in one of you post you contacted a pastor via Skype, was it Bob Larson?

Yeah I have only done weed and my incident happened when I mixed weed, unintentionally, with a couple of other things. I'm praying that in time my brain chemistry returns to normal. The pastor I contacted was Vincent Bauhaus (sp?). But it didn't stop the thoughts. I left my phone number on you page. Feel free to call or text.. I kind of understand what you're going through... And so does God.

lindsey35atl · Aug 30, 2016

I've been trying to do the same thing, seeking help from a pastor or people involved in ministry, because the thoughts are so sick and demented it seems the source must be demonic. I haven't had any improvement from trying to get pastors to help either. It's hard to remove the thoughts when you aren't clear on the source.

Something4Kate · Aug 30, 2016

Trust me... I'm having similar thoughts. My pure O has taken the form of blasphemous and satanic thoughts and it's so insidious. Because of our faith it wants is to believe its demonic but I really believe it's the mis-firing of your brain. I believe the enemy can use it to sow seeds of doubt, guilt, and shame but you mustn't fall for that. At one point my thoughts were so bad that I wanted it to end. You can't stop this from letting you live your best life. God is using this to draw me closer to him and I believe he is doing the same for you! Don't let the enemy use this to render you ineffective.

lindsey35atl · Aug 30, 2016

I read in one of your post you said you watched a horror movie before your incident, horror movies are a open door to the enemy and so is drug use. i've learned a lot about deliverance and the spiritual realm since my incident.

lindsey35atl · Aug 30, 2016

I'm thinking about getting on some medication called luvox, it's supposed to be good for pure o, I can't take it anymore i'de rather die than live like this. It's called pure o and it's pure hell!

Something4Kate · Aug 30, 2016

I did watch a horror movie which I think triggered my OCD. I keep forgetting that I am very sensitive to media I consume and foolishly watched it. I had that pastor pray over me afterwards but I still have the thoughts. It is hell. But I am learning, slowly, to trust God and realize he knows I don't mean the things popping into my head. I am trusting that he doesn't want to see me suffer but wants me to grow and persevere through this opportunity. If you personally feel you need medication then by all means talk with your doctor but I am trying to trust God and put everything in his hands...

ImAllLikeOkWaitWat · Aug 30, 2016

I've dealt with pure O but it went away. Or atleast the fear of the fear went away. I still get strange thoughts but when they happen i take a more carefree approach to them instead of reacting like omgz this is the end of the world i cant believe i thought that its over!.... you eventually become desensitized to disgusting thoughts or images and you dont like having them but you dont care that you have them anymore. You accept it as normal and don't think of yourself as weird or strange or dangerous because of these thoughts. Lots of people that I have talked to have strange thoughts. The diffrence is they don't obsess over them and move on with their day. Which is the key I have learned.

lindsey35atl · Aug 30, 2016

Lol thanx for the advise, I definitely have a this is the end of the world I am in agony, someone rescue me response! How long did it take for them to go away? What did you do to make it stop?

lindsey35atl · Aug 30, 2016

Something4Kate said:
I did watch a horror movie which I think triggered my OCD. I keep forgetting that I am very sensitive to media I consume and foolishly watched it. I had that pastor pray over me afterwards but I still have the thoughts. It is hell. But I am learning, slowly, to trust God and realize he knows I don't mean the things popping into my head. I am trusting that he doesn't want to see me suffer but wants me to grow and persevere through this opportunity. If you personally feel you need medication then by all means talk with your doctor but I am trying to trust God and put everything in his hands...[/QUOT

Justin1234 · Sep 3, 2016

I struggle with intrusive thoughts. I am sorry you go through that. if you ever need to talk ill be there. I am pretty sure you cannot surprise me.

james navoy · Feb 3, 2020

I saw vincent bahaus ministry mentioned here and I just thought that I add my 2 cents for what it's worth. I still have issues with the bad spiritual side of things unfortunately and am still trying to find a someone that can help. However, I have tried the vincent bahaus ministry service and I can honestly say you should try avoid it... I never post slander but this is exactly what happened. I arrived at the agreed upon location to meet the pastor. He arrived in his new bmw 5 series. He didn't know why he was meeting me and his first question to me was whether I was currently working. I knew something was up as soon as he asked that question but anyway, I handed him the required "donation" of £350 and explained my issue. He then took a picture of me on his ipad and then we proceeded to say some prayers. None of this did anything and I could've had the same result drinking a cocacola at the kfc down the road. A few days after it I was still experiencing the twitching all night and the sleep paralysis. I asked if I could maybe meet up to try again and I was told no, I just needed to pray more. And that was it, no solution and I was out of pocket. As I have stated at the beginning of this, this is not slander and this is exactly what happened. I believe there are exorcists out there that do have the capacity to help and I'm still searching for one 2 years down the road. Good luck to all those still searching out there, I feel your pain as I am still going through this bad phase in my life.

Mari17 · Feb 10, 2020

james navoy said:
I saw vincent bahaus ministry mentioned here and I just thought that I add my 2 cents for what it's worth. I still have issues with the bad spiritual side of things unfortunately and am still trying to find a someone that can help. However, I have tried the vincent bahaus ministry service and I can honestly say you should try avoid it... I never post slander but this is exactly what happened. I arrived at the agreed upon location to meet the pastor. He arrived in his new bmw 5 series. He didn't know why he was meeting me and his first question to me was whether I was currently working. I knew something was up as soon as he asked that question but anyway, I handed him the required "donation" of £350 and explained my issue. He then took a picture of me on his ipad and then we proceeded to say some prayers. None of this did anything and I could've had the same result drinking a cocacola at the kfc down the road. A few days after it I was still experiencing the twitching all night and the sleep paralysis. I asked if I could maybe meet up to try again and I was told no, I just needed to pray more. And that was it, no solution and I was out of pocket. As I have stated at the beginning of this, this is not slander and this is exactly what happened. I believe there are exorcists out there that do have the capacity to help and I'm still searching for one 2 years down the road. Good luck to all those still searching out there, I feel your pain as I am still going through this bad phase in my life.

That sounds like a bad experience. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. Do you have an anxiety disorder?

Intrusive Thoughts

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