Well that is how I feel and this is why. My job was very high stress and for years I have been entertaining the idea of an early retirement. I stuck it out for as long as I could and when I felt I had reached the end of my rope I told them about how I wanted to take early retirement because of the overwhelming stress. I looked at it like this. I was trying to get out of the lions den and they were trying to push me back in. If they were in that situation I would tell them to come out from that job and find another one. So they did not support me when I needed them. My wife said she could not manage me taking an early retirement. My son wanted me to work until he finished college. My son did not graduate from high school. He would play vid games all day. He was given then thousand dollars from his aunt. He spent that in a year. I asked him why are you spending all of your money. He said because I can. He started college but could not keep up with the work so he dropped out after about a year. He would not let me see his grades. He works at a pizza hut delivering pizzas not. My wife went talked me into going into getting a restaurant. That ended up using up fifty thousand dollars of our saving. After about a year she sold it to her cousin for a really cheap price. Then she went to visit her family in her home country and spent about ten thousand. So when I need them all they can think about is how my retirement pay is so much less than my work pay and how it would affect what they want. So i felt like all I was to them was a paycheck. No feeling of doing what they could to help out dad. So about a year and a half later, we are like strangers living together for convenience. She said if I get a job then I can have romance from her. Never mind that I suffer from chronic neck and back pain and I take three kinds of pain meds to keep it manageable. We are making it financially and more but she feels very distant. It is actually more than I can bear. I crave affection from a female. I feel lonely again. Just like when I was single. Both of them are as happy as a clam and they will not go to counseling with me. They say they have no problem. Thank you for letting me vent and maybe get a few suggestions. This has forced me to be closer to Jesus because I have to lean on Him.