My Wife and Son have betrayed me.

Greatfull

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Well that is how I feel and this is why. My job was very high stress and for years I have been entertaining the idea of an early retirement. I stuck it out for as long as I could and when I felt I had reached the end of my rope I told them about how I wanted to take early retirement because of the overwhelming stress. I looked at it like this. I was trying to get out of the lions den and they were trying to push me back in. If they were in that situation I would tell them to come out from that job and find another one. So they did not support me when I needed them. My wife said she could not manage me taking an early retirement. My son wanted me to work until he finished college. My son did not graduate from high school. He would play vid games all day. He was given then thousand dollars from his aunt. He spent that in a year. I asked him why are you spending all of your money. He said because I can. He started college but could not keep up with the work so he dropped out after about a year. He would not let me see his grades. He works at a pizza hut delivering pizzas not. My wife went talked me into going into getting a restaurant. That ended up using up fifty thousand dollars of our saving. After about a year she sold it to her cousin for a really cheap price. Then she went to visit her family in her home country and spent about ten thousand. So when I need them all they can think about is how my retirement pay is so much less than my work pay and how it would affect what they want. So i felt like all I was to them was a paycheck. No feeling of doing what they could to help out dad. So about a year and a half later, we are like strangers living together for convenience. She said if I get a job then I can have romance from her. Never mind that I suffer from chronic neck and back pain and I take three kinds of pain meds to keep it manageable. We are making it financially and more but she feels very distant. It is actually more than I can bear. I crave affection from a female. I feel lonely again. Just like when I was single. Both of them are as happy as a clam and they will not go to counseling with me. They say they have no problem. Thank you for letting me vent and maybe get a few suggestions. This has forced me to be closer to Jesus because I have to lean on Him.
 

Greatfull

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One main thing that helps me well two more things actually is that I believe the Rapture is soon so I feel like I will not have to live like this much longer. The other thing is I go to the stadium and workout for 30 to 40 minutes after dropping off my wife at work. It's very hot and I sweat a lot but I work through it. Some how it feels good and it keeps my weight stable even though I eat too much probably from the stress. I also fantasize about having another life with someone else who loves me and I love her too. In my mind I know it will never happen but it makes me "happy" for a little while. I don't blame God but I believe God has allowed me to be where I am for a reason. I also play combat arms on my computer. It is violently fun, if you are a gamer, you know what I mean. I also take pride in doing chores around the house. I think I know why no one has given me any comments. My situation has no real solving answers. I do want to work and am praying that God will help me get the right job. But I no long want any affection from my wife. I will be honest, if a female show me affection, I would go to her. It is a good thing that I'm ugly and over weight and not much money, I don't have to worry about getting some WANTED attention. hehe However in two years when I make 62, I can take early retirement from social security and mybe then I will have more options. But I doubt I'll be around for that(Rapture soon) ;)
 
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Greatfull

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Is your wife a christian?
She claims that she is but shows little to no interest in the Bible or sharing or anything like that. God only knows if her faith is true. My son shows some interest but seems to be more on the liberal side. When we do discuss any faith related issues there is no feeling of rejoicing. Feels more like a debate. Psychologically I feel like I am shutting down to the both of them but I put on an act so as to not be too obvious that I really dislike them. I looks at some old family pictures of when things were going good and it hurt me so much. One of the biggest thing that hurt me was when my wife told me I don't love my son because he is not mine. I raised him as my own since he was 16 months old. I loved him so much. I would give him so many hugs and kisses as he was growing up. I kissed him until he was about half way through high school. My dislike for them I believe to to protect my heart. When I think of my wife sometimes I still feel like I still love her but I have to learn to hate her so I can survive. I sleep on the couch most of the time with youtube on ruko playing one of the books of the Bible. Thank you I appreciate the interest. One reason is because it helps me to express how I feel. I have learned to appreciate kindness but not depend on it. I only depend of Jesus 100% and that is the way it has to be for me.
 
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mimi75042

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I am so sorry for what you are going through. Sounds somewhat like my marriage and my husband is constantly stressing and taking it out on me. He feels like a human atm machine so he claims,he said that everyone is out to use him. I am constantly praying for him and our marriage. Keep your head up and keep praying.
 
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NicoleWilliams

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You sound like a wonderful father and husband! I am so sorry to hear about the stress you’ve been experiencing in your family lately. How are things with your wife and son now? Have you considered counseling regarding your situation? Also, I suggest you to communicate your struggles with your family – may be they will understand? Sending prayers your way… And, remember that you have tremendous worth in the sight of God. He loves and cares for you deeply. I hope things with get better soon in your family. Blessings!
 
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Greatfull

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You sound like a wonderful father and husband! I am so sorry to hear about the stress you’ve been experiencing in your family lately. How are things with your wife and son now? Have you considered counseling regarding your situation? Also, I suggest you to communicate your struggles with your family – may be they will understand? Sending prayers your way… And, remember that you have tremendous worth in the sight of God. He loves and cares for you deeply. I hope things with get better soon in your family. Blessings!
They both refused counseling.....I have learned to bear this situation by leaning on the Lord. I can have an affair if a woman would show me affection. I think I still love my wife and son, but I don't like them. They are totally into the world. My thoughts of happiness are for the next life not this one. When I lay down I imagine I have a good woman who loves me and we are happy. That is my world of happiness right now. I'm working a part time job now at a department store. I really like this coworker and turns out she is a Christian with children but she did not mention a boyfriend or husband. I know she is not interested in me because she has not emailed me, so I know what I felt was just on my part only. At least for just a little while it felt good to be "liked" by someone special. I should be so sad and broken up and I feel it is the Lord keeping me up and functioning. I tell Him from time to time....it is more than I can bear...and then I know to lean on the Lord at those times and I take His yoke which is easy as the Bible says. Thankyou Nicole for just showing a little compassion and for your prayers.
 
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