Yes dear. Happy wife, happy life and other terms...

RedPonyDriver said:

Sweetheart, hubs and I have over a century of living, combined under our belts...he doesn't nag me and I don't nag him because we're grown ups.

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Good for you.
So are you ok with the statement:
If the wife had just done as she was asked the the husband would not have _______ her.

blessedwife318 said:

Yeah I looked at that after I posted. I do take counsel from older women that I see with happy wonderful marriages. They are all in the complementary camp.
Call me a child if it makes you feel better it's no skin off my back

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See Titus 2

lisah said:

I think "Happy wife, happy life" is a term of endearment. You can usually tell when men use these terms for the women in their lives, that it comes with a great deal of affection. Or, at least, I have never seen it use in any derogatory way, or as a complaint by men. I don't think it has anything to do with power struggles, in any real sense.

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Never struck me that way either.

HannahT said:

Actually, it was acting ugly. Completely different from 'ugly'. Google it.

I have explained why I feel you seem to have a very closed mind towards other viewpoints. I guess I would ask you to go back and read them instead of just breezing past them. It's clear by your responses you didn't the first time if that is your true interest.

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Yeah I'm talking to 4 people unified in their view but I'm close minded. I think you and I have different definitions of close minded.

RedPonyDriver said:

See Titus 2

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See 1 Tim 4

blessedwife318 said:

Maybe if I put it this way it will make more sense. The very next post after my original had this idea in it.

If the husband would do as asked the first time then the wife would not nag him.

Let me change the gender around:
If the wife would do as asked the first time then the husband would not _______ her.

Everyone of you (I hope) would rightfully be up in arms about how dare the husband pin his actions on his wife.

Maybe that will help you understand why I had to repeat over and over that women are adult responsible for their own actions.

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I said that was my post. Read my response in post 211.

blessedwife318 said:

8 years years from now when I'm still happily married what will your response be then? Come back in 10 more years? I mess with your world view but you can run from that if you choose

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You didn't mess with my worldview. lol. I have not only lived in an egalitarian marriage and had successful egalitarian relationships, but I have also formally studied the marriage relationship from both the secular and the Christian worldview. I know what I'm talking about.

blessedwife318 said:

Yeah I'm talking to 4 people unified in their view but I'm close minded. I think you and I have different definitions of close minded.

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When you can't answer questions, and can't stand on subject - then make accusations? Ahh. Yeah. Logic would say closed minded. Not sure what you call it. No doubt you will inform us though.

By the way - your not messing with anyone's 'world views'. You have to make sense before that is even challenged. That is the first logical step.

ValleyGal said:

You didn't mess with my worldview. lol. I have not only lived in an egalitarian marriage and had successful egalitarian relationships, but I have also formally studied the marriage relationship from both the secular and the Christian worldview. I know what I'm talking about.

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That good. Should I post my resume as well?
I've studied from both a Christian and secular worldview. I have a successful complemtarain relationship.

HannahT said:

When you can't answer questions, and can't stand on subject - then make accusations? Ahh. Yeah. Logic would say closed minded. Not sure what you call it. No doubt you will inform us though.

By the way - your not messing with anyone's 'world views'. You have to make sense before that is even challenged. That is the first logical step.

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I'm sure you know what it means logically when you have to resort to insults

blessedwife318 said:

That good. Should I post my resume as well?
I've studied from both a Christian and secular worldview. I have a successful complemtarain relationship.

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2 years ain't nothing to brag about sweetie

blessedwife318 said:

I'm sure you know what it means logically when you have to resort to insults

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It's not an insult. Its just the facts. Your not making any sense, and your all over the place with your input.

blessedwife318 said:

Good for you.
So are you ok with the statement:
If the wife had just done as she was asked the the husband would not have _______ her.

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ONE MORE TIME...ain't no nagging in this house. No reason for it from either side. Be a grown up.

RedPonyDriver said:

2 years ain't nothing to brag about sweetie

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I'm happy with my time married and look forward to many many more years with my wonderful husband. Dismiss that if you want but it's true.

RedPonyDriver said:

ONE MORE TIME...ain't no nagging in this house. No reason for it from either side. Be a grown up.

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Good. But are you ok with that (that doesn't say nag).

HannahT said:

It's not an insult. Its just the facts. Your not making any sense, and your all over the place with your input.

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Sure it makes sense, but that might change your view if you acknowledge that.

blessedwife318 said:

I'm happy with my time married and look forward to many many more years with my wonderful husband. Dismiss that if you want but it's true.

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Good for you but exactly who do you think you are telling us we have it all wrong when we have marriages that are long lasting, wonderful and fulfilling? Again, you are a child and have no business making any assumptions of anyone else.

blessedwife318 said:

If the husband would do as asked the first time then the wife would not nag [ask repeatedly] him.

Let me change the gender around:
If the wife would do as asked the first time then the husband would not ___ask____ her repeatedly.

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Everyone of you (I hope) would rightfully be up in arms about how dare the husband pin his actions on his wife.

Maybe that will help you understand why I had to repeat over and over that women are adult responsible for their own actions.

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I've already posted---I have NO problem with that. Why would anyone have a problem with that? It equally goes both ways (I've posted that many times, actually).....that if needs and opinions are given equal weight and concern in a marriage (and if both spouses are open about what they're capable of fulfilling for the other---and grace is in place for life to get in the way).....then there's no need to ask repeatedly.

If the sentence read: "If the wife would do as asked for the first time then the husband wouldn't beat her"----that's a WHOLE other story. But asking another time? That's just a natural result of either dismissing the other person or forgetting (which a reminder shouldn't be taken so defensively). In our home.....sincerity is a welcomed attribute. We're not fans of sugar-coating and coddling (tippy toeing around issues).

No....it doesn't help me to understand why you think there's a correlation to the wife's sense of responsibility in all that (or ---if the gender is flipped---that the husband's sense of responsibility is an issue). Then sentence is focused (originally) on the husband's ability and trustworthiness to follow through.

Again with the employment example: If I were late to work.....my supervisor would say something about noticing. If I'm late again.....it's going to be brought up again.....should we focus on how the supervisor is continually "nagging" me about being late? Or....should the emphasis be on my inability to get to work on time? We're talking "natural consequences".

RedPonyDriver said:

Good for you but exactly who do you think you are telling us we have it all wrong when we have marriages that are long lasting, wonderful and fulfilling? Again, you are a child and have no business making any assumptions of anyone else.

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I have made no assumptions about your marriage. I have only responded to post that make women not responsible for their actions, blaming husbands for their wife's response.
You can take it personally if you choose to that I'm a non feminists, and all the opinions about feminism that comes with it. I know what (most) feminist think about nonfeminist housewives and my response is meh. They are entitled to their opinion about me and its no skin off my back.
I'm old enough to not take it personally when people disagree with me. That's life.

blessedwife318 said:

Sure it makes sense, but that might change your view if you acknowledge that.

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Just saving for its richness.