Hi, so I guess I am in quite a predicament and I don't have any idea how I should handle it in the best Christian way possible...
I have one beautiful daughter who is 18 months old. I adore her so much and am so beyond thankful to God for her. Her father and I were married for a year then divorced because he was abusive toward me physically and very emotionally controlling. He even went so far to say "what if I were to kill our daughter?" After that I separated from him and took my daughter with me. A few months went by and he said that he was getting help from a Christian therapist and was doing better. I agreed to then let him started spending time with our daughter as long as he was at his parents house where he wouldn't be alone with her. A few months went by and we seemed to be doing okay so then as we were approaching the court date for our divorce I made a HUGE mistake of filing for joint custody. After the divorce the time during our exchanges of our daughter started to become really nasty real fast. He started to question where I was living because I left my parents house. Wanting to know an address and desperately asking me to let him see the place where our daughter is living. And normally I understand the concern of our child's well being but he is so controlling and on such a power trip that I do not believe his concern is for our daughter... but his own need to constantly control me. Things became worse and worse and the abuse just continued during the exchanges (happening right in front of our daughter). The only issue is he knew the fine line of where he could get away with harassing me without physically harming me or making any direct threats). It led to us having to go through exchanges at the police station then to me getting a restraining order against him for two months. The restraining order was just lifted a week ago. In the two months that he was not allowed to contact me, I was hoping he would have taken the hint to leave me alone and stop harassing me. Then of course he started to harass me again right outside the courtroom! And just today he stood right outside my car waiting for me to give him my address of where I was living! I am so sick and tired of being controlled and having to meet at the police station to exchange our daughter. I literally am disgusted by this person by the abuse that I have experienced from him. And because I have done a terrible job documenting the patterns of abuse and calling the police when needed and the fact that we have joint custody... no one, not the police, my attourney, or the judge is taking me seriously! This is causing me so much fear and sickness I feel like I am still stuck in this abusive controlling relationship. He is my daughter's father so I just want to be able to get along...but the only way for that to happen is to give him the control he desires and I'm not willing to do that. And taking it to court is apparently not going to work. I need help, from anyone! Please, how should I handle this? Thank you!
I have one beautiful daughter who is 18 months old. I adore her so much and am so beyond thankful to God for her. Her father and I were married for a year then divorced because he was abusive toward me physically and very emotionally controlling. He even went so far to say "what if I were to kill our daughter?" After that I separated from him and took my daughter with me. A few months went by and he said that he was getting help from a Christian therapist and was doing better. I agreed to then let him started spending time with our daughter as long as he was at his parents house where he wouldn't be alone with her. A few months went by and we seemed to be doing okay so then as we were approaching the court date for our divorce I made a HUGE mistake of filing for joint custody. After the divorce the time during our exchanges of our daughter started to become really nasty real fast. He started to question where I was living because I left my parents house. Wanting to know an address and desperately asking me to let him see the place where our daughter is living. And normally I understand the concern of our child's well being but he is so controlling and on such a power trip that I do not believe his concern is for our daughter... but his own need to constantly control me. Things became worse and worse and the abuse just continued during the exchanges (happening right in front of our daughter). The only issue is he knew the fine line of where he could get away with harassing me without physically harming me or making any direct threats). It led to us having to go through exchanges at the police station then to me getting a restraining order against him for two months. The restraining order was just lifted a week ago. In the two months that he was not allowed to contact me, I was hoping he would have taken the hint to leave me alone and stop harassing me. Then of course he started to harass me again right outside the courtroom! And just today he stood right outside my car waiting for me to give him my address of where I was living! I am so sick and tired of being controlled and having to meet at the police station to exchange our daughter. I literally am disgusted by this person by the abuse that I have experienced from him. And because I have done a terrible job documenting the patterns of abuse and calling the police when needed and the fact that we have joint custody... no one, not the police, my attourney, or the judge is taking me seriously! This is causing me so much fear and sickness I feel like I am still stuck in this abusive controlling relationship. He is my daughter's father so I just want to be able to get along...but the only way for that to happen is to give him the control he desires and I'm not willing to do that. And taking it to court is apparently not going to work. I need help, from anyone! Please, how should I handle this? Thank you!
