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what are you feeling right now? (23)

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Tempura

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Feeling a bit low right now. My emotional mind is telling me I'm useless and im stupid. I almost self harmed but my partner stopped me.

Good that you were stopped.

Our feelings often betray us. And about feeling stupid - so what? I KNOW I'm useless and stupid myself. And that's alright, I don't mind at all! But you probably already know that it's not about how you feel about yourself, but about that tendency to self-harm no matter what the case.
 
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Tempura

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meh. i played video games all night and found i can't focus on ac4 very well, and i haven't gotten very far, despite owning it for two years. it's the same with all of my other favorite games. used to be i could sit there for hours and beat the entire thing in one sitting, and now, i can barely sit still for more than ten minutes at a time before wanting to do something else. i guess i just need an immersive game that has a different story line than the same old tropes thrown together. i liked assassin's creed (and then the ending of ac3 happened) because it felt different, i like characters who are morally ambiguous, who are close to jumping off the slippery slope, i like it when characters have conflicted feelings about what they're doing, the "by any means necessary." and that's just not a very popular thing.

I only played the first one. Now there's so many of them that I don't even want to bother. Some of my friends got AC Unity, played it for an hour and quit it. I'm not going to even try.

I got Alien Isolation a few days ago, cheap. I'm surprised how good it is. It's very taxing, I can only play it for so long before I have to stop, but there's so much detail and love toward the first Alien movie - which is of course the best of those movies by far.
 
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chaoticfirefly

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I only played the first one. Now there's so many of them that I don't even want to bother. Some of my friends got AC Unity, played it for an hour and quit it. I'm not going to even try.

I got Alien Isolation a few days ago, cheap. I'm surprised how good it is. It's very taxing, I can only play it for so long before I have to stop, but there's so much detail and love toward the first Alien movie - which is of course the best of those movies by far.

I hear Unity was a complete mess, and Rogue was good but I haven't played either of them, just watched let's plays and Unity doesn't look that great. The other AC games are pretty good but the ending of 3 felt like a cop out and Revelations was just milking the Ezio thing. 2 and Brotherhood was the peak of the AC series in my opinion.

I haven't seen the Alien movie and this is the first time I've heard of Alien Isolation.
 
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Jeshu

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Didn't get much sleep at all last night even though I was feeling exhausted, the night took forever and I ended-up with a bad headache half way through it. I did go to work today and that was good. We yapped about Christ working in our hearts when we confess our sins and shortcomings to Him and had a very interesting discussion about that, how when we die to sin we are freed from its power. I tried to catch an hour sleep after I came home but that didn't work. What sleep concerns things are not looking up yet, even though I have worked very hard at getting sleep - it is not always paying off. Lets hope I catch a few hours tonight.

blessings to all
 
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Jeshu

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I need some more prayers. For some reason I got it into my heads at night that Christianity is dying and that more and more people are leaving the church--and somehow, that means me as well. I have to just get it in my head that these fellow Christians are my friends and that they won't leave me and Jesus will not let them be snatched away. And that includes me.

If Christianity dies as a religion then that would be a good thing and not a bad one. I believe that faith in Jesus sets us free but that Christianity as a religion captivates believers in Christ and drinks their life blood.

Faith in Christ sets us free brother, if I was you I hold onto Christ and the truth of the bible but let go of organised religion, it only causes confusion and hardships and doesn't love the Spirit of Jesus nor our neighbours.

It is the truth of Jesus that sets us free.
 
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Jeshu

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meh. i played video games all night and found i can't focus on ac4 very well, and i haven't gotten very far, despite owning it for two years. it's the same with all of my other favorite games. used to be i could sit there for hours and beat the entire thing in one sitting, and now, i can barely sit still for more than ten minutes at a time before wanting to do something else. i guess i just need an immersive game that has a different story line than the same old tropes thrown together. i liked assassin's creed (and then the ending of ac3 happened) because it felt different, i like characters who are morally ambiguous, who are close to jumping off the slippery slope, i like it when characters have conflicted feelings about what they're doing, the "by any means necessary." and that's just not a very popular thing.

Yes that happened to me as well. 20 years ago I bought all the new games and played often to well into the night. I used to keep my computer on the latest models just to be able to play the new games that were coming out. When I got sick I lost all interest in gaming and only just this year am I recovering a little from that. I've installed all my old games - and even bought a brand new game - x-plane - a flight simulator with the whole world as playing field - the games is 80 gigabytes in size, the biggest game I've ever bought. I ordered it from America, so I'll will have to wait another 3 weeks or so before it arrives, in the meantime I'm flying around on the demo. I last between 10 minutes to about half a hour. Only when the grand kids come do I play for a few hours in a row as they love watching me play and I keep on going even though I have had enough of it for their sake. We're playing Broken Age right now, and the grand kids love it. 3 of them are coming tomorrow for a sleep over and all they can talk about is the computer game awaiting them. Cute
 
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chaoticfirefly

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Yes that happened to me as well. 20 years ago I bought all the new games and played often to well into the night. I used to keep my computer on the latest models just to be able to play the new games that were coming out. When I got sick I lost all interest in gaming and only just this year am I recovering a little from that. I've installed all my old games - and even bought a brand new game - x-plane - a flight simulator with the whole world as playing field - the games is 80 gigabytes in size, the biggest game I've ever bought. I ordered it from America, so I'll will have to wait another 3 weeks or so before it arrives, in the meantime I'm flying around on the demo. I last between 10 minutes to about half a hour. Only when the grand kids come do I play for a few hours in a row as they love watching me play and I keep on going even though I have had enough of it for their sake. We're playing Broken Age right now, and the grand kids love it. 3 of them are coming tomorrow for a sleep over and all they can talk about is the computer game awaiting them. Cute

It's the worst, to be honest. One of the games really helped when I was friendless and trying to learn to accept myself as I am, and one of the messages in the game is, "you have a right to live from the moment you're born" and that just really held on since my first time playing it when it was localized here and I've played it multiple times since then and beaten it, and now, I just can't sit through it. And I still love the game so, so much. The same with the AC series and everything else, but I can't sit through them for very long before giving up because I can't get immersed.

X-Plane sounds like it's a lot of fun and laid back! Is it? 80 gigabytes is a lot! Even the Civ 5 game doesn't up that much (and there's a lot to it, and my computer can barely handle the graphics as it. It's 8 gigabytes according to the Steam Store).

Oh that's so cute! I hope you guys have fun! I've heard of Broken Age, I think Steam recommended it to me after I added Ori and the Blind Forest to my wishlist.
 
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Jeshu

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It's the worst, to be honest. One of the games really helped when I was friendless and trying to learn to accept myself as I am, and one of the messages in the game is, "you have a right to live from the moment you're born" and that just really held on since my first time playing it when it was localized here and I've played it multiple times since then and beaten it, and now, I just can't sit through it. And I still love the game so, so much. The same with the AC series and everything else, but I can't sit through them for very long before giving up because I can't get immersed.

X-Plane sounds like it's a lot of fun and laid back! Is it? 80 gigabytes is a lot! Even the Civ 5 game doesn't up that much (and there's a lot to it, and my computer can barely handle the graphics as it. It's 8 gigabytes according to the Steam Store).

Oh that's so cute! I hope you guys have fun! I've heard of Broken Age, I think Steam recommended it to me after I added Ori and the Blind Forest to my wishlist.


I hadn't heard about Broken Age before but found it on the Gog site for a good price and it runs well on Linux machines. So far I've enjoyed the game, and the kids love it. An unusual story line but quite well thought through.
 
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Tempura

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I haven't seen the Alien movie and this is the first time I've heard of Alien Isolation.

Well now child, it's time to fix that mistake! It's called just "Alien", directed by Ridley Scott, starring Sigourney Weaver and Tom Skerritt, and it was made in 1979. Even though it's old, it's like wine - it just gets better. A classic, check it out.
 
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We yapped about Christ working in our hearts when we confess our sins and shortcomings to Him and had a very interesting discussion about that, how when we die to sin we are freed from its power.

blessings to all

Interesting. I consider myself dead to depression, anxiety and fear.
 
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Poster0

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If Christianity dies as a religion then that would be a good thing and not a bad one. I believe that faith in Jesus sets us free but that Christianity as a religion captivates believers in Christ and drinks their life blood.

Faith in Christ sets us free brother, if I was you I hold onto Christ and the truth of the bible but let go of organised religion, it only causes confusion and hardships and doesn't love the Spirit of Jesus nor our neighbours.

It is the truth of Jesus that sets us free.


I have observed that there is a subtle kind of organized religion which masquerades itself as being free from religious boundaries, yet its not free at all. It rejects commandments found in the New Testament because it lives in fear of them. It boasts of being free from fear as well, but is actually snared by fear.
 
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chaoticfirefly

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the ambien isn't working and i want to cry.

edit: screw this gender. i can't keep going through this. i hurt too much i can never sleep around this time and doctors push meds like it's candy and ignore when their patiences say they know what they need. so i'm glad planned parenthood exists! in two months, i will be free from this nefarious hell and constant pain and ups and downs and dysphoria and the cancer will be gone too.
 
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BlessedMommy05

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Hello Everyone, I hadn't heard about the games for PC right? I used to play PS3 n may get an Xbox 1 or some thing not sure got save some $ for it though. Its cool and little damp here, maybe rain on way have no clue n all the sudden a headache is striking and I want to strangle my female cat she had a 2nd liter and driving me crazy! We priced out a washer just now got wait for some bills I paid to clear the bank before I can think on getting one for us. I don't need over-draft stuff right now either makes each month harder when it goes that route. I did find some cammo green flannel pants I want and a white/pink sweatshirt for $10 but we'll see if I can get them or not. Since my medicines make me cold in the winter and with the a/c on I am even colder..brrr!!!

So far trying to clean the kitchen and put it back to order driving me nuts due to we bombed the house from bugs n mice Friday and I have to take it an easy due to my shoulder hurting if I over do. Course I see my Dr Fri so that'll help some. I been sneezing since I woke up not sure if its the cleaning I'm doing or the weather changes ugh! I bought some allergy meds yesterday and its a 1 pill dose and I like those better than the useal 2 pill dose. Seems to work. Hope today goes nice and better than the weekend. A new "friend" shall I say got me and a roommate some nail polish I was not thrilled with it since I don't know him to well to want such a small "gift" makes me uneasy and [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]ed off honestly I get moody when I don't want something just hard for me to accept it. Eh well..*shrugs*

Blessings Everyone. Hugz!
 
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grandvizier1006

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the ambien isn't working and i want to cry.

edit: screw this gender. i can't keep going through this. i hurt too much i can never sleep around this time and doctors push meds like it's candy and ignore when their patiences say they know what they need. so i'm glad planned parenthood exists! in two months, i will be free from this nefarious hell and constant pain and ups and downs and dysphoria and the cancer will be gone too.
:hug: i'm sorry you're going through so much right now. I hope you can get better.
 
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Jeshu

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I have observed that there is a subtle kind of organized religion which masquerades itself as being free from religious boundaries, yet its not free at all. It rejects commandments found in the New Testament because it lives in fear of them. It boasts of being free from fear as well, but is actually snared by fear.

The itchy ears group I call such organisations, they only uphold what they want to see and hear, but not what God teaches us in His Word. Its best not to add or subtract from God's Word but adhere to all that is written.
 
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Jeshu

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Friends please celebrate with me! I woke up at 5 am this morning - which means I slept close to 7 1/2 hours last night - a first in a long time. The lack of sleep was really starting to get to me so I'm happy I got one night of good sleep, lets hope I get a few more in time to come.

Have a great day
 
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Tempura

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Friends please celebrate with me! I woke up at 5 am this morning - which means I slept close to 7 1/2 hours last night - a first in a long time. The lack of sleep was really starting to get to me so I'm happy I got one night of good sleep, lets hope I get a few more in time to come.

Have a great day

Yes! Well done, sir. Get a little streak going if you can.

Perhaps you needed this one good night to have several more - as if to remind you that it can be done.
 
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Jeshu

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.....

X-Plane sounds like it's a lot of fun and laid back! Is it? 80 gigabytes is a lot! Even the Civ 5 game doesn't up that much (and there's a lot to it, and my computer can barely handle the graphics as it. It's 8 gigabytes according to the Steam Store).
.....

apparently x-plane is 8 double sided dvd's big - I'm really looking forward to it - someone told me that there are 15000 airports from which one can start their missions - and 100s of aeroplanes to choose from - including a ride on a space shuttle. I've always been a lover of flight simulators but this seems to be the mother of them all. I should have it by the end of the month.

have a nice day:wave:
 
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