Hi, everyone. I'm new to this website, and this is my first post. I joined mainly because I am needing some advice from some fellow Christians. I feel I can't talk to people in my hometown about this because my dad would be very angry with me if I did.
You see, I grew up in a small, rural town in Oklahoma, and my dad is a 4th generation farmer. But recently, things have been really tough in the world of farming. We just got out of a 5 year drought and now we're dealing with flooding damages and 100+ degree weather. My oldest brother was in a lot of legal trouble in high school, so my dad had to drop a lot of his savings to help him out, and this drought has drained him of any money that he may have had left over. We have zero savings and are swimming in debt. With virtually no money coming in, my dad is feeling hopeless and like a failure. He has told my mom point blank that he feels like we would be better off without him. I hate to see him like this, because I love him and I know how hard he works everyday for us.
He isn't and hasn't been very strong in his walk with the Lord for some time now. Our family had a falling out with our church over something we thought was morally wrong back around 2003 when I was just a little girl. Since then, my dad has been bitter towards the church. He used to make up excuses as to why he didn't want to find a new church home, but now he just doesn't go at all and says nothing. It's become a habit, and my dad is the most stubborn person I know. He has a Bible, but I'm not sure when he last opened it. I'm not even sure if he prays anymore... This all kills me, of course. I don't know what to do though. How do you help someone who doesn't want to be helped? My mom has cried to him, begging him to start going to church again and to stop being bitter, but not even that works. You can't make my dad do something he doesn't want to do. Therefore, I feel helpless because I want to help him but there doesn't seem to be a solution. I feel as if God has taken his blessings off of this farm because of my dads choices, as he is the head of the household. I want him to get back in his walk with God for his own physical and emotional sake, but also for the sake of my family. His bitterness is affecting us all, as well as his hopelessness.
So I guess what I'm asking is for some advice. How do I approach this situation with someone who is stubborn, closed-off, and hides everything with sarcasm and humor? How do you help someone who won't help themselves?
Katie
You see, I grew up in a small, rural town in Oklahoma, and my dad is a 4th generation farmer. But recently, things have been really tough in the world of farming. We just got out of a 5 year drought and now we're dealing with flooding damages and 100+ degree weather. My oldest brother was in a lot of legal trouble in high school, so my dad had to drop a lot of his savings to help him out, and this drought has drained him of any money that he may have had left over. We have zero savings and are swimming in debt. With virtually no money coming in, my dad is feeling hopeless and like a failure. He has told my mom point blank that he feels like we would be better off without him. I hate to see him like this, because I love him and I know how hard he works everyday for us.
He isn't and hasn't been very strong in his walk with the Lord for some time now. Our family had a falling out with our church over something we thought was morally wrong back around 2003 when I was just a little girl. Since then, my dad has been bitter towards the church. He used to make up excuses as to why he didn't want to find a new church home, but now he just doesn't go at all and says nothing. It's become a habit, and my dad is the most stubborn person I know. He has a Bible, but I'm not sure when he last opened it. I'm not even sure if he prays anymore... This all kills me, of course. I don't know what to do though. How do you help someone who doesn't want to be helped? My mom has cried to him, begging him to start going to church again and to stop being bitter, but not even that works. You can't make my dad do something he doesn't want to do. Therefore, I feel helpless because I want to help him but there doesn't seem to be a solution. I feel as if God has taken his blessings off of this farm because of my dads choices, as he is the head of the household. I want him to get back in his walk with God for his own physical and emotional sake, but also for the sake of my family. His bitterness is affecting us all, as well as his hopelessness.
So I guess what I'm asking is for some advice. How do I approach this situation with someone who is stubborn, closed-off, and hides everything with sarcasm and humor? How do you help someone who won't help themselves?
Katie
