The laughter thread.

Colin

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A couple from London decided to go to Florida to thaw out during one particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.

Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left London and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel, and as there was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.

Meanwhile....somewhere in Manchester, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a clergyman of many years who was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages of condolence from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen and the open email which read:

> -----------------
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived
Date: 27 Feb 2004

I know you're surprised to hear from me, but they have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow! Looking forward to seeing you then!
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

PS Sure is hot down here!!
 
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brinny

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A couple from London decided to go to Florida to thaw out during one particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.

Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left London and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel, and as there was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.

Meanwhile....somewhere in Manchester, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a clergyman of many years who was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages of condolence from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen and the open email which read:

> -----------------
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived
Date: 27 Feb 2004

I know you're surprised to hear from me, but they have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow! Looking forward to seeing you then!
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

PS Sure is hot down here!!

ROFL!!!!
 
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brinny

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11751859_437246236477805_7282033700245392076_n.jpg

hahahaaaa!!!!
 
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Colin

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A frog goes into a bank and approaches the assistant . He can see from her badge that her name is Patricia Whack.
"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a £10,000 loan to take a holiday"

Pattie looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger,
and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Pattie explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure, I have this", and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright, pink and
perfectly formed.

Very confused, Pattie explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog named Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow £10,000, and he wants to use this as collateral".

She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?!"

The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knickknack, Pattie Whack, give the frog a loan - his old man's a Rolling Stone."
 
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Root of Jesse

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At their Easter service, a Baptist pastor called all the children of the church up to the stage. He asked the children if they knew what the significance of the Resurrection was. The children were all very quiet until one brave little boy raised his hand. He said "I'm not sure what the Resurrection is, but I know that if you have one for more than four hours, you need to go to the emergency room."
The congregation took a while to get over that one, and the pastor never did a children's sermon after that...
 
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LittleLambofJesus

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The blind clerk and the rod and reel

A woman goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel.
She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the register.
There is a clerk associate standing near the counter with dark shades on.
She then asks him, "Excuse me sir...can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"
He says to her, "Ma'am I'm blind, but if you will drop it on the counter I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound that it makes."
She didn't believe him, but dropped it on the counter anyway.
He then says, "That's a 6' graphite rod with a Zebco 202 reel and 10 lb. test line...It's a good all around rod and reel and it is on sale today for only $20.00".
She then exclaims to him, "That's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I think this is what I'm looking for, so I'll take it."
The woman then digs into her purse for her credit card and as she picks it out, it drops on the floor.
The clerk remarks: "Ohh, that sounds like a Master Card!".
As the woman bends down to pick it up off the floor, she let's out a big fart!
At first she is embarrassed, but then realizes that there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was her that tooted...being blind he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.
He walks behind the counter to the register to ring up the sale and says to the woman ", "That will be $25.50."
The woman, being puzzled, says to the clerk, "But didn't you say it was $20.00?"
He says, "Yes ma'am, the rod and reel is $20.00, the duck call is $3.00, and the catfish bait is $2.50."
 
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brinny

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Two cannibals are eating a clown.


One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

ROFLOLOLOLOL!!!! Ohhh hep meee i cain't breeeeathe

25r30wi.gif
 
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brinny

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At their Easter service, a Baptist pastor called all the children of the church up to the stage. He asked the children if they knew what the significance of the Resurrection was. The children were all very quiet until one brave little boy raised his hand. He said "I'm not sure what the Resurrection is, but I know that if you have one for more than four hours, you need to go to the emergency room."
The congregation took a while to get over that one, and the pastor never did a children's sermon after that...

hahahaaaaaaa! ^_^
 
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brinny

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The blind clerk and the rod and reel

A woman goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel.
She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the register.
There is a clerk associate standing near the counter with dark shades on.
She then asks him, "Excuse me sir...can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"
He says to her, "Ma'am I'm blind, but if you will drop it on the counter I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound that it makes."
She didn't believe him, but dropped it on the counter anyway.
He then says, "That's a 6' graphite rod with a Zebco 202 reel and 10 lb. test line...It's a good all around rod and reel and it is on sale today for only $20.00".
She then exclaims to him, "That's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I think this is what I'm looking for, so I'll take it."
The woman then digs into her purse for her credit card and as she picks it out, it drops on the floor.
The clerk remarks: "Ohh, that sounds like a Master Card!".
As the woman bends down to pick it up off the floor, she let's out big fart!
At first she is embarrassed, but then realizes that there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was her that tooted...being blind he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.
He walks behind the counter to the register to ring up the sale and says to the woman ", "That will be $25.50."
The woman, being puzzled, says to the clerk, "But didn't you say it was $20.00?"
He says, "Yes ma'am, the rod and reel is $20.00, the duck call is $3.00, and the catfish bait is $2.50."

LOL!! ^_^
 
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LittleLambofJesus

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ROFL! One of my favorite all time funny vids!!
I actually started a thread on the GT some years back. Thanks for posting that..

http://www.christianforums.com/threads/just-a-fun-question-purse-and-airbag.7346106/
Just a Fun question Purse and Airbag
Discussion in 'General Theology' started by Feb 24, 2009.


Everyone give their view of this u tube video scene. Do you think it was staged or actually happened.

Just thought this would be fun. Thanks.

.
 
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brinny

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WarriorAngel

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The blind clerk and the rod and reel

A woman goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel.
She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the register.
There is a clerk associate standing near the counter with dark shades on.
She then asks him, "Excuse me sir...can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"
He says to her, "Ma'am I'm blind, but if you will drop it on the counter I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound that it makes."
She didn't believe him, but dropped it on the counter anyway.
He then says, "That's a 6' graphite rod with a Zebco 202 reel and 10 lb. test line...It's a good all around rod and reel and it is on sale today for only $20.00".
She then exclaims to him, "That's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I think this is what I'm looking for, so I'll take it."
The woman then digs into her purse for her credit card and as she picks it out, it drops on the floor.
The clerk remarks: "Ohh, that sounds like a Master Card!".
As the woman bends down to pick it up off the floor, she let's out a big fart!
At first she is embarrassed, but then realizes that there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was her that tooted...being blind he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.
He walks behind the counter to the register to ring up the sale and says to the woman ", "That will be $25.50."
The woman, being puzzled, says to the clerk, "But didn't you say it was $20.00?"
He says, "Yes ma'am, the rod and reel is $20.00, the duck call is $3.00, and the catfish bait is $2.50."
:o
ROFL...thats so bad its funny.
 
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