I recently got engaged to a man I've been dating off and on for a month. He's a Christian, as am I. But lately he's been doing and saying things that lead me into lust, which I don't like and I don't know how to respond. I set a boundary, saying I didn't want him kissing me until we got married if that was what God wanted. At first, he said this was all right with him. Now, he's all over me. He's kissing and touching me inappropriately. He also just revealed that the ring he gave me, which is a lovely pearl ring, he had actually picked out for another woman whom he dated before me. I'm not sure how I feel about even wearing this ring now. Nor do I feel good about being with him. I'm uncomfortable and I feel like Achan in the Bible. Am I holding on to something I should let go of? I feel like engagement should be something to be excited about, joy and peace, but all I feel is trepidation and fear. I just don't know if this is me having an off day or if this is a legitimate reason to be concerned. Please pray that the Lord will show me what to do - and show him as well. I don't want a relationship that isn't meant to happen.
Unsure about Engagement
- Thread starter Hmarie30
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This forum is for PRAYER needs...and I will be praying for your direction.
You may find a better response/support/advice in the Courting Couples forum.
Off the cuff....there are a lot of red flags: fast engagement after a short/intermittant dating period, disrespect of your boundaries, getting a second hand ring...and your statement
I'd encourage you to seek counsel as a couple, and if needed break off the engagement so you can discern what your true feelings are.
God bless you
You may find a better response/support/advice in the Courting Couples forum.
Off the cuff....there are a lot of red flags: fast engagement after a short/intermittant dating period, disrespect of your boundaries, getting a second hand ring...and your statement
I'd encourage you to seek counsel as a couple, and if needed break off the engagement so you can discern what your true feelings are.
It sounds LEGIT to me....go with your gut, take your time... and refuse to be pressured.
God bless you
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Remny
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Be patient, there's no need to be engaged after a month. Strong feelings are natural in the beginning of a relationship, and they are awesome, but the trick is having the patience to see if they last, or even if they wax and wane. Relationships take tons of effort and patience. So do not be quick to marry this guy, but also do not be quick to get rid of him. He made a silly blunder by telling you about the ring, but I don't think that makes him a bad guy. God wouldn't want him to waste it would he? In the end such symbols are just idolatry and unimportant anyhow.
Try to forgive his kissing. People do need to be touched, even if it's non-sexual, it's part of healthy human development, even if touching often leads to some lust. You don't have to let him kiss you, but try to be understanding of his desire to kiss you!
Anyhow, I'm seriously praying for you guys! I hope things work out.
Try to forgive his kissing. People do need to be touched, even if it's non-sexual, it's part of healthy human development, even if touching often leads to some lust. You don't have to let him kiss you, but try to be understanding of his desire to kiss you!
Anyhow, I'm seriously praying for you guys! I hope things work out.
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- Apr 19, 2007
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Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
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AHH who-stole-my-name
in accordance with Christ
You don't get engaged to someone you don't know and one month is far too short a time to know anyone. If you do you will be surprised all the way up to the time he dumps you for not living up to what he thinks you should be.
He obviously thinks he deserves a reward for giving you a ring, which tells you right there how much he respects you.
Sorry, but I've went through too many of these fall head over heels for a heel thing with my niece and her friends. I am not being rude but being brutally honest with you because I care .
If you leave him or stick around you will not have a relationship with him because he doesn't see you as anything more than a conquest that he purchased with a ring that was most likely brought for another women who is no longer with him, most likely for a good reason.
I can tell you that there is about as many white knights in shining armor, for you ladies as there are damsels needing rescued from themselves for the men. You don't ignore that which you find undesirable in hopes that it gets better for the same reason you don't buy a broken lamp hoping that it will work down the street. You go out and find a complete person, ready-made to put you on a pedestal, so you can be the partner that he will respect. If not then you are more a Mrs. Right and not a Mrs. Right now!
Red flags are red for a reason and your God gave you the incite to notice what is not right. Follow those warning signs right out of his front door and thank God that he thought you were stupid enough to fall for his antics, so early in this facade.
I would also let the women in your congregation know of his actions. They need to understand what this person is and to keep clear until he changes his attitude.
He obviously thinks he deserves a reward for giving you a ring, which tells you right there how much he respects you.
Sorry, but I've went through too many of these fall head over heels for a heel thing with my niece and her friends. I am not being rude but being brutally honest with you because I care .
If you leave him or stick around you will not have a relationship with him because he doesn't see you as anything more than a conquest that he purchased with a ring that was most likely brought for another women who is no longer with him, most likely for a good reason.
I can tell you that there is about as many white knights in shining armor, for you ladies as there are damsels needing rescued from themselves for the men. You don't ignore that which you find undesirable in hopes that it gets better for the same reason you don't buy a broken lamp hoping that it will work down the street. You go out and find a complete person, ready-made to put you on a pedestal, so you can be the partner that he will respect. If not then you are more a Mrs. Right and not a Mrs. Right now!
Red flags are red for a reason and your God gave you the incite to notice what is not right. Follow those warning signs right out of his front door and thank God that he thought you were stupid enough to fall for his antics, so early in this facade.
I would also let the women in your congregation know of his actions. They need to understand what this person is and to keep clear until he changes his attitude.
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Praying for guidance, wisdom, clarity and peace in the name of Jesus Christ. Thank You Lord!
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Father I pray blessings and help in this relationship in Jesus name I pray.
Also taking these needs before God in prayer on the 1:15PM bbnradio.org Family Altar program.
Also taking these needs before God in prayer on the 1:15PM bbnradio.org Family Altar program.
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