Wow, so much good stuff has happened in the four months since this last post
! I'm continuing with this thread because a couple of new situations occurred which are connected to the original scenario.
Before I get into the continuation, let me say I have passed the one year mark at my current job, I would label myself 99-100% over the divorce, I redecorated my apartment (and continue to do so), I have two personal business projects I am working on which leads me into the next triumphs: I have grown to like being alone because of my projects, and currently don't have a need or want to date or get serious! I am too wrapped up in my entrepreneurial quests and prefer to spend my non-job hours making my business dreams come true!
Now onto this thread. In late March I received in the mail two envelopes pertaining to my former mother-in-law. I opted to send them to my ex (since she returned to living with her parents) with a note. I never replied to her January letter which was her response to my original letter earlier that month. Her January note said she was happy for me and included her cell phone # "if I wanted or needed it." Neither of these offerings were the case.
In my March reply I said the reason why I was mailing her was the two envelopes for her mom, I appreciated the offer of giving me her cell # but "my girlfriend sometimes uses my smartphone." I also relayed to her my general doctor, who she also loved, got colon cancer. Note: I do not have a girlfriend. (My last girlfriend was her.) I said this to let her know I've moved on and to make sure that "wanted or needed" offer from her was not a subtle attempt at some form of reconnecting.
This past Saturday while doing my laundry in my building's basement I checked my mail. The first envelope on top was from her. I knew right away by the handwriting it was her, though she didn't put her return address like on her January envelope. She said she was good "thank God", was happy for me that I have a girlfriend, and felt bad about my doctor. She also said the reason she had given me her cell # in her January letter was in case I needed it for an emergency and that I didn’t need to call her. The tone of the letter was her usual nice demeanor.
If anyone would like to dissect this recent letter and offer your opinion on it, especially why she took two months to reply to my letter--when she really didn't need to, feel free to.
Other than making me mildly curious, the timing of the letter’s arrival was actually a distraction from negatives at work. The past four days were really, really rough and the letter was a welcomed distraction, albeit brief.
To the new folks reading this: you can get through the heartache of divorce, especially an unwanted one like mine! Lock arms with the Lord, “Trust Him and lean not on your own understanding,” pray, read Scripture and do things YOU enjoy doing. Take time to appreciate yourself, your work, your family and friends. Learn a new hobby or craft. If you need therapy, do it! Just make sure you feel comfortable with the therapist. If you have to take meds to help with the emotions, don’t be ashamed. (If for example, you had acid reflux and your doctor prescribed Nexium—you wouldn’t take it?) Lastly, don’t look at my recovery or anyone else’s. Everyone heals at different rates and times. It’s not a race. It’s a process.
God bless!