Give "Bad" Advice (3)

Tell him he is not Bruce lee in a loud manner, and that he is crazy for thinking that way.

How to make a fart smell good?

Put your fart on fire!

I've always wondered what spring is like on Jupiter and Mars... How do I get there?

Consult Google. they have access to everything. Invest in them so they'll not only take over the world, but the universe too.

I need to build an antiderivative F(x) of f(x) = e^(e^x) satisfying F(8) = -1.

Well, duh. It's 6.02x10^23. You can always trust me with your advanced math problems.

What should I have done about the person making too much noise at the movies tonight.

Every possible evil thing you can think of that the Bible prohibits against that man. It's worth going to hell for after all. I sure am posting great advice on the perfect forums.

I have trouble resisting the ads on this site.

Well, if you can't resist the ads you might as well click on all of them and buy the stuff advertised. Otherwise, what's the point of agonizing over it?

I'm not sure if I should do the housework first or if I should do something fun first.

do the fun stuff n' ferget about housework

what's the best way to deal with spiders?

...

SO hose it down with the yard hose.

I need to clean the dashboard and dust inside my car

Sounds like a great time to buy a new car.

The neighbor kids keep knocking on our door, but our kids don't feel like playing with them today.

Drive them away with a broom.

What should I do with my leftover food from last night?

Freeze it in an ice cube tray with popsicle sticks stuck in. You can eat them for dinner on a hot day.

It's time to eat, but the food is not quite cooked all the way.

Eat it, it's food anyway.

It's so hot.

Buy several boxes of ziploc bags, go outside and capture the hot air in bags. When winter and cold weather comes in a few months, release the captured hot air in your house and save money on heading bills.

We're looking to sell our house and move to another community, and don't know where to begin.

Advertise it on facebook, lowest bidder wins!

I can't sleep.

Start eating until you are 100% full, you couldn't sleep anyway.

I have a job interview tomorrow, any tips ?

don't shower , wear Superman pj outfit and keep quiet.

Going to the public pool in a hot hot day..

Wear a pair of skinny jeans, jacket with a hood and a mask

The students are cheating

Just tell yourself cheating is also a high level use of intelligence and creativity. Don't make a fuss out of it.

My nephew is only 5 years old but he was seen smoking.

Duh, send him a dozen of packs everyday.

Power outage again?