Im a 13 year old boy who has had a serious problem lately. It actually started in April and my Birthday was in May so it actually started when I was 12. This problem started with a simple thought of selling my soul. Then thought that I couldn't control came and were saying "I'll sell my soul for this or that." I have always been a devoted Christian and these thoughts would sometimes put me in tears. Then other thoughts came that would blaspheme God. Then feelings came that made me willing to sell my soul but I never did. I don't think that matters because I'm almost certain that you can't sell your soul. It's impossible! But now I'm starting to get really into worldly things and it seems I never have time for God, not like I used to. Now I mite watch one video about God then goes on Christian forums and then I mite watch a movie about God and then one little verse from the Bible. Well I guess that still is a lot but I have my doubts. Now I get feelings of hate and I never used to. And I get angry easier, a lot easier and for no reason. I also get the feelings of I want to go to hell, heaven is too boring or too cold. I try to kick the feeling out but I can't same with the thoughts. Sometimes it feels like I hate God, I try to kick the feeling out but I can't. This is all scaring me. It seems I'm starting to care a lot less about this and I don't know if it is because I've found lots of Christian advice on this and that other people have gone through similar things or if it's because I just don't care about my salvation. At school I've started to teach about God and have gotten an atheist who used to hate the bible and called it all lies to believe God. Got one to read the Bible and know he bought one. Stopped one from making bad jokes about God and yeah. I think I mite just be teaching to save my own skin. Sometimes I think I just teach to God and praise him because I'm trying to save myself. I honestly don't want to go to hell. All I want is for how it used to be before this. When the Holy Spirit would be with me 24/7. But now I think I'm screwed. These thoughts and feelings won't stop. I think of God and I'm just terrified now. Please help me. I think I mite have an OCD because when I was little I would always get ill thoughts about God and could not stop them. I've been being attacked since I was little. Some say I'm getting attacked often because of how close I was to the Lord, they call me special. I don't feel special. And the now I get thoughts because sometimes other Christians tell me stuff on to stop certain things and I get thoughts like well little do you know I'm more important and stuff like that and now I feel like a snob. And what kinda scares me is that I don't care anymore I think it mite be too late. Please give me advice I'm so scared.