Hi,
I had a similar struggle for many years. I although believing God for a partner could not seem to enter any long term relationship. After getting married I reflected on my experiences, and wrote the following advise for singles. See if it helps you.
Internet Dating
Opposite to popular belief Christian Internet dating is actually a very good way to meet local singles. It is the way I met my wife, but I will leave the discussion of our meeting to a different category. Every person I met while internet dating were very good Christians with good walks with God. The trick with internet dating is to pick profiles that share similar spiritual interests to you. If you like to talk about God, find some one who talks about God in their profile. But don’t pick some one who you think is too spiritual for you. There were people who talked about going on mission trips, that was too spiritual for me, they were very good people, and although my walk with God has been one of outreach to unbelievers going on overseas mission trips is not my thing. Pick people who sound like they are at your level. My wife did not have much success with dating men online, so experiences may vary, just test people out.
Expect Rejection
Many people date more than one person, or when online dating have communication with multiple different people. This means that in the dating world a person may leave you for some one they see as better. I once dated a really nice Christian girl who I met on a dating Website, we got on really well together, and had a good time. But eventually she found another man and went out with him, he was better looking than me. So be prepared for rejection, and don’t take it personally.
Be Prepared to make friends
There was a Church I attended where there were quite a few girls that I liked. I found that over time I made friends with all of them. We were friends for years. I also got to know some of their parents. This was not something I had to force but it just happened naturally. Be open to natural connections. But be aware that you may need to actually ask one of them out, I hid my feelings for years, so never really will ever know if one of them would have dated me. Friendships are good, but because the goal of friendship is not marriage it is hard to know where you stand. After a season of genuine friendship if you do like some one I suggest ask them out. But be prepared for your friendship to end some girls get spooked if you bring up the relationship word. It has happened to me once.
Mission Trip Meetings
Often Christians meet their partner on mission trips. Or during church out reaches or groups. Often a Christian partner will have a similar desire in God to you. My brother met his wife on a mission trip. God spoke to him and told him he was going to marry a person on the trip. He thought it was the devil, so ignored it. But the girl who God mentioned took an interest in him, and they started dating, they then got married, they now have a happy family life.
Direct Revelation from God
In this section I am going to discuss the care that needs to be taken when entering this realm. I am a Christian who prays a lot and from time to time can hear God's voice. He has used this method for various ministry reasons such as, salvation, or rescue, or finding out special information useful for furthering the gospel. But when it comes to relationships you must be careful. Firstly the devil often will try to deceive people into thinking they are destined for a particular person who will never marry them or even like them, to cause harm to them. The other difficulty is God may set you up in a situation and give you a chance, but ultimately the other person has a choice and that choice may be no. I once saw a really attractive girl on a Christian dating Website, I said to God, "Could you get that person to contact me and let me know you sent them, I am too scared to ask her out". One year latter that girl contacted me asking me out for a date. At the same time some days before she contacted me God gave me a vision of the place where the person had been baptised, and gave me a picture version of their online username. So when this person turned up I though great God has sent me a wife, with out thinking I told the girl that I had had a vision, and though we were destined to be married. This scared her witless, and she said I was being too intense. This filled me with fear, and I sent her an email telling her she was probably right, and told her all my faults. This just scared her off because she probably though I was crazy, and it totally devastated me, the devil used it as an opportunity to blame God, and it caused me to doubt God even loved me or cared for me, to the point I felt God did not even want me to be a Christian. From this you can see that although God may answer your prayer, even provide you with a sign, there is not a 100% guarantee that things will work out. People have a choice. That said I actually received my wife via direct revelation from God. I was on a Christian dating site and I said to God there must be someone on here who could make a good wife for me show me who. I prayed for a search term to enter into the search box, with the word I received I typed it into the search box. My wife’s profile came up first in the search results. I thought she looked ok, so I contacted her. To my supprise she had been trying to contact me, but had been unable to. We were in the same city, so we decided to go out dating, and I told her nothing about what I had done in prayer. We got on well together, went out for a few months to movies, parks, shopping, and decided to marry. We are now happily married and have a son. So God can use direct revelation. But be aware when trying to hear God’s voice, God does not always speak, often the devil will always say something to confuse you. Voices in the spirit realm are very similar. So you may well hear Satan, or both God and the devil. If you start getting confused, just stop, and be aware God has not spoken. If things start working out for good, just use your natural mind to test things out. The spiritual will just lead to the natural anyway. You don’t want to be asking God for every thing, he just won’t tell you, and it will give the devil the opportunity to confuse you.
