I too read that article yesterday and read it as one woman towards other women. However, I also took a few moments to gaze upon it as to how I treat my own wife as I am the one who does most of the shopping, spends most of the time with the kids, does most of the laundry, we share in the cooking and cleaning. So I started looking at so many of the examples that she shared and said to myself that I remember when my wife backed into the railing scratching up the car...yup I went off the deep end and she no longer parks on that side of the garage. But that was really the only one. I don't really get worked up about the other stuff.
However, I let her read the story and she reflected upon it and she looked at her own personal attitude and how often she yells at me for no apparent reason. I told her that when she lets it out, it has nothing to do with what happened at home usually, it usually had something to do with work and I just let it roll off my back. No big deal. She has a stressful job and I know that and sometimes she just needs to vent. I don't do that to her, I usually go for a long walk or I go to my parents house.
But when we read this story there was one couple that fits this article to a "T". Her parents...her mother orders her father around like he is her own personal slave and treats him like dirt. Why he does not say anything or puts up with it we don't know. Everything from the way he does laundry, to cooking, to cleaning, to driving, you name it.
She was with me once and was criticizing me for my driving...driving to fast, driving to slow, driving to much towards the center, driving to much towards the right, didn't like the way the truck rode, thought it sat too high, didn't like the way it rode with the cruise on. This is a GMC 1500 with a 6.0 V8...so we are talking some serious horsepower under the hood of this truck. Finally I could not take it anymore, I pulled over and said "walkin' ain't crowded, get out" She just looked at me and said "what". I said "I can't take it anymore and I won't. All you have done is criticize my driving, my truck, how high it sits, how fast I am driving, how it handles, how it rides. Well you know what, I did not ask you to help pay for it, I did not buy it for your comfort, I bought it for my comfort, so if you don't want to keep your mouth shut about the way it rides then start walking" After telling our Pastor about this and what happened with my mother-in-law he told me that this probably the first time that anybody has stood up to her. Mind you she was quiet the rest of the way home and she has never ridden in my truck since. Also it sits no higher than the average 4wd pickup from the factory. I also was not speeding as I would set the cruise to the speed limit or really close to it, unless it was under 25mph.
I read that article and the one thing that caught me was how he had the look on his face that her son would have when she scolded him. That aha moment of treating her husband like a child. This is her life partner not her child and should be treated as such.
So many women marry a man thinking they can change him to their way, but men think the same thing...I can change her to my way. I am guilty of that and will admit to it. I had to because my wife was a lousy cook and she would admit to it when we first were married and if we were to survive, I had to change her cooking methods and her old ways from what her mother taught her and teach her the right ways...no more short cuts, we are going to do things the right way and have the proper ingredients or we will not make it, no substitutions for what might work. Her mother would do things like if she did not have milk would use powdered milk instead or if she did not have sugar would use honey or if did not have baking soda would use baking powder. I am sure you see some serious problems with these ideas. She would also make her own pasta sauce using only tomatoes with no spices...yuk. First time my in-laws showed up for a meal we had a huge lasagna. My father-in-law had four servings. My mother-in-law was insulted because he ate so much of mine and his response was the the difference between your lasagna and his is that his lasagna actually tastes like lasagna. Don't envy that ride home. This is when she actually did the cooking and cleaning because he was still working. Now that he is retired she treats him like a slave.
