I have no hope through this struggle

CIsikwe

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im 22 years young. About last week I really had this feeling and I sat down and prayed and promised myself to get back on the correct path with God. Everyday since I've been reading and praying trying to talk to God. Before that, I've always felt like there is a demon or evil spirit in me. I asked why do I think negative thoughts? Why do I sin and sin and sin? Why is my mind formed to be so demonic and detrimental thinking? Through thinking all this, I still have kept my Christian background and just tell myself everyday God has my back. Now there's so much from my past that is coming back to me. Making my life stressful and personally it's hard. I had a point in my life where I told myself what if I am an omen and just a demon waiting to come out. But I know God is real and true. He has done so much for me and even brought me through the fires that I didn't even ask him too. This is a hard struggle and I feel I have no one to talk and confess to. I know what's wrong and everything revolves around that. I sit through small states of depression daily to ask myself why am I not a "good Christian?" There were times I've wanted to die because I felt as if I won't make it into Heaven anyways. I've started reading about keeping faith through hard times and to remember that God is with me[EDIT]. It's hard. I have no where to openly express how I feel other than here. The thoughts that run through my head, I feel as if only a demon can think this way. But I tell myself that the devil is just trying to break me. This is a fight Jesus has won for me already. How do I know if I've truly given myself to Jesus. In my adult and free-willed life I truly believe that I have confessed to the Lord and accepted him as my savior. But how do I know that it's true and just not this isn't a fake thing in my mind that I "think" I did? It's hard for me. It effects me with school, family, finances and most definitly my relationships. Anything to encourage or help me daily change my thinking of myself will help. Thank you to all.
 
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RC1970

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"Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." ~ Romans 8:26-28
 
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CIsikwe

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Do you mind explaining that to me? I'm not great at reading and interpreting the Word.

"Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." ~ Romans 8:26-28
you
 
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RC1970

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Do you mind explaining that to me? I'm not great at reading and interpreting the Word.
None of us know how to pray or what we should be asking, but the Spirit does knows. The Spirit is constantly interceding on our behalf. And, we are called (brought to faith) by the Spirit and directed in our lives to fulfill the purposes of God.

So, we should not worry about the purposes of our lives (this is for God to direct), but we should busy ourselves with the means of grace that He has given us to fulfill His purpose. You should pray, study your Bible, go to church, fellowship with other Christians and give of yourself to help others.
 
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mcarmichael

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I've started reading about keeping faith through hard times and to remember that God is with me and he also has forgiven me for all sins that I have committed and will commit.

Maybe this is where you are going off. Who said that God has already forgiven you for every sin that you will commit? You have no proof, thus you flounder.
 
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aiki

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About last week I really had this feeling and I sat down and prayed and promised myself to get back on the correct path with God.

Well, here's part of your problem right here. Promising your self that you will get back on the right path is not the way to get where you want to go. Like begets like. A dog begets a dog; a cat begets a cat; a dandelion begets a dandelion, and so on. You can only beget more of you; Self begets itself. So, when you make promises to your Self to change, you can only expect that more of your self will develop.

Everyday since I've been reading and praying trying to talk to God.

Is this where you should start? The First and Great Commandment is to love God with all of your being (Matt 22:36-38). Don't you think you should start there? If you are living for God out of a love for Him, you won't have to try to do so. You'll want - no, you'll love - to do so.

Before that, I've always felt like there is a demon or evil spirit in me. I asked why do I think negative thoughts? Why do I sin and sin and sin? Why is my mind formed to be so demonic and detrimental thinking?

If you are a born-again believer, God's Spirit dwells in you and there is no room for the demonic. A genuine child of God cannot be possessed by demons. If, as a believer, you have dabbled in things demonic (ouija boards, seances, occult magic, fortune telling of any kind, demonic music, or evil movies concerning the demonic) you may have invited demonic oppression upon you. Oppression is not the same as possession. The former is strong - sometimes overt - external demonic influence and attack, the latter is internal demonic control.

Negative thoughts are not necessarily demonic. Such thoughts can arise for many reasons.

Why do you sin and sin? Well, let me ask you: Do you know who you are in Christ? Do you know the truth of your justification, sanctification and identification with him? Are you living in constant surrender to him? If not, you have your reasons for your constant disobedience to God.

I had a point in my life where I told myself what if I am an omen and just a demon waiting to come out.

Well, that's just silly. It may make sense in a movie but not in real life. You aren't a demon waiting to come out. God does not create such things, and if He doesn't create them, they don't exist.

I sit through small states of depression daily to ask myself why am I not a "good Christian?" There were times I've wanted to die because I felt as if I won't make it into Heaven anyways.

By yourself, you can't ever be a "good Christian." Only God can make you godly. And He does that as you're walking in full surrender to him throughout each day, and are living in the truth of who you are in Christ.

The truth is that no one can make it into heaven on their own. God saves us; we cannot ever save ourselves. Our salvation rests entirely on Christ, not ourselves. He is rock-solid, unmoveable and unchanging. And because he is, our salvation, which rests upon him, is also rock-solid and unchanging.

But I tell myself that the devil is just trying to break me.

He is always working to break all of us. So, we have to be on our guard and walking closely with our Heavenly Father.

This is a fight Jesus has won for me already.

That's right. He has.

How do I know if I've truly given myself to Jesus. In my adult and free-willed life I truly believe that I have confessed to the Lord and accepted him as my savior. But how do I know that it's true and just not this isn't a fake thing in my mind that I "think" I did?

You won't doubt your salvation when you love God deeply. Remember, loving God is the First and Great Commandment out of which your life as a believer is supposed to flow.

Selah.
 
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Goodbook

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How do you know if youve given yourself to Jesus? Well. Did you go get baptised after you repented?

A christians new life begins after baptism. If you have not taken this step..ask God for the baptism in Jesus name. He cant dwell in you if you are not baptised.

People dont just say and believe they are christians after professing something..God makes you a christian by reaching down and changing YOU not the other way round. And getting baptised is not going to be just in your mind.
 
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Goodbook

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When you wrote about dying well thats it..you die to yourself, counting Jesus death on the cross..then are raised to new life. This is what baptism represents.

Meditate on what Jesus did for you on the cross. The payment of sin was his blood. This doesnt happen just in your mind it REALLY happened. He did this because He loves you.

Look in Romans 5 Paul explains what Jesus did for us and that we have hope because of Him.
 
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Johnnz

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You do seem to have some pretty unhelpful notions about you and God. Maybe you had a 'fire and brimstone' 'repent or be damned' gospel preached at you. Depression so easily leads a person into negative thinking patterns, which are not helpful. Some wise and very practical counsel, not just moral precepts, might help you.

John
NZ
 
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tturt

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Some suggestions are - Do you have a place you can go without many distractions? If you start thinking about tasks you need to be doing, etc., asks Yahweh for His help to keep your mind on Him. Access Biblegateway.com audio Bibles. You might want to read Psa 145 out loud and start memorizing it. btw, in v 6 "terrible acts" means awesome deeds. Anyway, sometimes I play it several times. Be persistent.

David's situation in the I Sam 30 account was extremely difficult. He and his men returned to camp and found their dwellings and everything was burnt plus their wives and families were gone. Then the guys who just fought with David talked of killing him. David wept until he couldn't. Then he encouraged himself in The Lord.
 
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Psalms119

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Some suggestions are - Do you have a place you can go without many distractions? If you start thinking about tasks you need to be doing, etc., asks Yahweh for His help to keep your mind on Him. Access Biblegateway.com audio Bibles. You might want to read Psa 145 out loud and start memorizing it. btw, in v 6 "terrible acts" means awesome deeds. Anyway, sometimes I play it several times. Be persistent.

David's situation in the I Sam 30 account was extremely difficult. He and his men returned to camp and found their dwellings and everything was burnt plus their wives and families were gone. Then the guys who just fought with David talked of killing him. David wept until he couldn't. Then he encouraged himself in The Lord.
Listen to THERE IS NO TRUTH IN FLESH ~ MICHAEL January 8, 2017 by council1arch #np on #SoundCloud
https://soundcloud.com/https%3A%2F%2Fsoundcloud.com%2Founcil1archive%2Four-father-warned-us-michael-01-08-17
 
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aiki

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I dont think this its what the bible says. Romans 6:4

So, Christ's death, his crucifixion, comes before his burial and resurrection. How do you think we were united with Christ in his crucifixion, as Paul also teaches in Romans 6? If we are only buried and raised with Christ through baptism, what ritual unites us with Christ in his dying on the cross? Or is a ritual, perhaps, not really necessary to our identification with Christ?

By the way, Goodbook, I have many times appreciated your comments.

Selah.
 
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Goodbook

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The lords supper aiki

Are you asking this cos you dont know?

Sorry, this is kinda off topic.
jesus asked his discples to go tell the gospel and baptise people. Then they eat the lords supper together and have fellowship. It wasnt the other way round. John the baptist didnt ask people to eat with Jesus, he prepared the way by first asking people to repent and be baptised.
 
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Goodbook

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Jesus always indicated that people be washed first. He even made a point of it with Peter, going so far as to wash his feet, before he ate with them. Judas was one of the unwashed.

Jesus ministry truly began when he was baptised. Christians are people whove been baptised in Jesus name, because they believed. It isnt a ritual its a true born again experience.
Even john the baptist didnt think Jesus had to be baptised since of course he didnt need to be having no sin but Jesus insisted. Then everyone heard from heaven cos God said this is my beloved son in whom I am well pleased.

There was no mistake about it.
 
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aiki

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Hey, Goodbook.

I agree with you that baptism is important. I asked you about how we identify with Christ in his crucifixion since this is as important as identifying with Christ in his burial and resurrection. There would be no burial and resurrection without the crucifixion, right? The thing is, there is nothing like the act of baptism that signifies our co-crucifixion with Christ. I wonder, then, how vital the act of baptism is to our identification, our union with, Christ in his burial and resurrection. Are we really only united with him when we are baptized? Why would this be the case when we have no such ritual uniting us with Christ in his crucifixion? It seems we can be united with Christ in his crucifixion simply by an act of faith on our part. But if this is so, why can't it be true of our union with him in his burial and resurrection, too?

Selah.
 
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