Do feelings for someone ever actually go away?

Gilbert 61

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As the title says, do feelings for someone ever actually go away or do we just replace them with someone else?


Secondary question. I am reading a book and there was an interesting quote. From a lady: "I didn't know that guys hurt like they do until I had sons of my own." what is your guys take on that?
 

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nope. your feelings can change and be strengthened/weakened with time, but they never completely vanish.

I agree. I also think we can reach a point in which we can become numb/indifferent to our feelings for someone but it only takes a small reminder to conjure them up once again.
 
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Thunder Peel

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That's why it's so important to stay busy. I've become a workaholic over the last nine months and it's kept my mind off of all the rough stuff I had to go through last year. It's only when I'm falling asleep or first getting up in the morning that they seem to haunt me.
 
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Sapphyre

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It depends entirely on the situation.

If someone hurts you bad enough, it may take time, but eventually you will be completely indifferent. If you see them act in a way or say something that makes you see them differently, you'll soon find yourself indifferent towards person.

Remember, it's actually indifference that's the opposite of love, not hate.

Of course, if the person has never done anything to do and you were never actually in a relationship with them, and you see them all the time... then it's next to impossible to get over them in my experience. :\
 
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Thunder Peel

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Sadly enough I've never been.... how do you say? In love with someone lol But I imagine those emotions are hard to remove, but over time it, like others said, will diminish over time.

You sir, are quite lucky. I'm envious of those of you who have never been in love and can still walk with your hearts intact and your heads held high. Anyone want to trade?
 
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Sapphyre

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Sadly enough I've never been.... how do you say? In love with someone lol But I imagine those emotions are hard to remove, but over time it, like others said, will diminish over time.

Hm. I actually might argue that it's easier to get over someone you were in a relationship with and in love with than a crush or someone you dated for just a little while, in that at least when a breakup is involved you can remember the reason why you guys didn't work and can use that as a springboard for moving on. With crushes sometimes we just replace them with new people.

Of course once you love someone the amount of time it takes for the feelings to go away increases exponentially. :p
 
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Shadolus

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You sir, are quite lucky. I'm envious of those of you who have never been in love and can still walk with your hearts intact and your heads held high. Anyone want to trade?


Better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all...... Just kidding lol I know that's a big bowl of crapola.

Thunder, everyone's path is different and your experience will be meant for good in the end, I'm sure of it. That doesn't discount the crappy feelings you have from time to time though. For one thing, that relationship has given you the experience to know what NOT to do and what worked for next time.... and yes, there will be a next time.
 
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Gilbert 61

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That's why it's so important to stay busy. I've become a workaholic over the last nine months and it's kept my mind off of all the rough stuff I had to go through last year. It's only when I'm falling asleep or first getting up in the morning that they seem to haunt me.

I can understand now why people drink. If I thought it would help I'd probably give it a shot.

Yeah, I have started doing so much just to keep my mind busy... But like you said at the end of the day getting ready for bed and whatnot... That's when the devil attacks. That's why it has become more important for me to get into the word in the morning and at night.

I literally started working out 2 to 3 times a day, coaching football, going to school, looking for a new job, while working 30-40 hours a week, teaching youth group at church, air soft at least once a week. What scares me is that I am so busy that I won't find a girl.

Drinking won't help, I had a beer when my ex first broke up with me just to get sleep. I got 2 hours that night. Which was the most I got the whole week after the break up.

Saying all that, I wouldn't give up the feeling of being in love for anything in the world. Most amazing feeling I have ever had. And if God decides to bless me again, it's going to be even more amazing.
 
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KingCrimson250

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Yep! Had this one girl a few years ago that I couldn't stop thinking about. She literally took my breath away every time I saw her, and I would get all fuzzy just hearing her name. I was lovesick and I had it bad. Anyway, even though I saw her everyday, after a while, it just went away. That sort of basic infatuation is just raw brain chemicals, which have to calm down sooner or later, right?
 
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You sir, are quite lucky. I'm envious of those of you who have never been in love and can still walk with your hearts intact and your heads held high. Anyone want to trade?

agreed. lol I'm seeing how much I've changed in the past years. Getting your heart ripped out and stomped on does a number on you.
 
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Thunder Peel

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agreed. lol I'm seeing how much I've changed in the past years. Getting your heart ripped out and stomped on does a number on you.

It does indeed. I can't wait until we get The Corner of Self-Loathing back up and running around here.
 
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Blank123

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nope. your feelings can change and be strengthened/weakened with time, but they never completely vanish.


this. I believe they can also change into something else entirely. If I'm honest, I still do love my ex boyfriend, but I'm not in love with him anymore. And we broke up two years ago this summer, and haven't talked since last fall. I think I'll always love him too. On some level.

But its not the deep agonizing, "oh how I wish I could get him back!" kind of love. I don't have romantic feelings for him and I could never date him again, but I just really just care about him and want the best for him in life. Even when that means him falling in love with someone else and marrying her. As long as he's truly happy.
 
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GeoffryMcDonald

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I do believe that time heals all wounds, however scars remain.

I am one of the unfortunate few who feels as though any two Christians no matter who they are (assuming one is male and the other is female), can date and end up being perfectly happy for the rest of their lives, regardless of personality types. And as such, out of the three real relationships I've had, I have always been the one standing on the corner with the broken heart.

The hardest thing is not knowing why.

I digress.
 
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white dove

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nope. your feelings can change and be strengthened/weakened with time, but they never completely vanish.

I'd say something along these lines ^ but I don't know that to be 100% true. I can't say "never" because I haven't lived that long. It appears to be true for the most part. At least for right now.
 
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not completely...I mean, yeah like others have said, they can change.

For me personally, I'm apparently not capable of caring just a little bit, so when I like someone, it's me caring 100% for that person. So, it's definitely a very difficult thing to let go of....Even if the romantic feelings go away..there's always something there...

and this is why I hate crushes...it can be torturous during and even long afterwards. Oy.
 
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