Patience ... why is it so hard?

[Smiler33]

I am famously impatient - I want things to happen NOW! I was baptised in the holy spirit just over 4 weeks ago; I didn't feel anything but since that very moment have been able to speak in tongues. That alone should be evidence enough for me shouldn't it, but oh no I want to full caboodle - the lovely warm feeling, the just knowing that the Spirit is active in you. I don't want the falling on my knees bit, but just want some other evidence that it has really happened for me.

Why am I thinking this? I have real faith; I know God, Jesus & The Holy Spirit love me, I have faith that when I pray in this strange language I am getting right through to heaven, but why on earth do I want the other physical signs too? I almost feel when I'm praying something is blocking me; I was brought to tears on Friday but nothing since then.

Feelings are unreliable, I know that but why am I always so impatient for yet more signs that God loves me?

 

[miamited]

Hello Smiler,

When I gave my life over to the Lord I was an unrepentent sinner caught up in drugs and fornications of all sorts and I was known to use some fairly coarse language. I was also impatient. Within a matter of weeks the drugs and the language cleaned up rather quickly. The patience and fornications have taken much longer. If you are anxious about your lack of patience, then I would accept that this is the new Holy Spirit beginning to take up residence in your body and convicting you of some of the things that need to be cleaned up now that the King is on the throne of your heart. I would find it hard to believe that this issue of patience is only in your desire to know God, but I would caution you that if it is, that you be very careful about ascribing such desires as wanting the whole kit and kaboodle of righteousness right now. The first thing that that is liable to lead to is dissatisfaction in your faith if you don't get it right away.

Here's the plan. Establish a regular time of prayer and reading of God's word. Pray for an unquenchable thirst to know Him. Persevere.

God bless you.
In Christ, Ted.

 

[Smiler33]

Thank you Ted - no I'm not just impatient when it comes to spiritual matters I'm afraid to say ... just ask my family :o!!!

I have been trying to set time aside each morning to pray and read the bible. I also like to relax in God's presence whilst out walking the dog so just about to leave to do that now!

God Bless.

 

[razeontherock]

Welcome to the family Smiler!

There are positive aspects of what you're describing. Are you familiar with this verse, and the associated problems?

"I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot.
Rev 3:16 So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth."

Not very ladylike, but that literally says we can make Him sick. That is NOT your problem!

You can call this zeal, or fervor, or a lot of things. In those amazing letters to the 7 Churches in Rev, Jesus tells us to "remember our first love." This IS your "first love," so - - don't lose it!!

I was there in 1984. Let me share a bit I've learned about patience:

pray for patience = ask for trouble. DON'T DO IT. Instead, pray to glean every bit of patience that exists in the tribulation of that day. It's going to be there anyway, right? Just like a peach has a pit and everything brings forth after it's own kind, there is patience included right along with the difficulty. It works!

Rev 14:12 Here is the patience of the saints: here [are] they that keep the commandments of God, and the faith of Jesus.

 

[Aibrean]

Humans desire instant gratification. The Israelites were complaining only a month after being delivered from Egypt. When I was baptized I expected an instant change too. It is only after three years of time passing that I realize the change was instant but I had to be to this point to reflect and realize it. No...I don't get a "warm feeling" (I have experienced that prior to my baptism though) but my whole life and outlook has completely changed.

 

[Smiler33]

Thank you. I can see that I am different in my outlook; I guess I just have to let go of the feelings side of me and rely on my FAITH - I can't really have someone at my side praying with me making me feel all warm inside all the time now can I!!

 

[Smiler33]

Do you know what - I am reading Dave Roberson's book 'The Walk of the Spirit - The Walk of Power' and I am sure it was written just for me! I am reading about how impatient people get when they receive the gift of tongues - they expect amazing things to happen instantly, and forget all the small 'tweaks' being made to you. As he says, people look out for the spectacular and miss the miraculous!

God is healing me from the inside out. In my life, as well as all the 'normal stuff' I've been sexually assaulted and have been depressed for over 6 years now. However, He has helped me deal with the assault (I've forgiven the man who did this to me - not face to face but to God) and I am on the lowest dose of antidepressants I've ever been on.

God is GOOD!!!!

 

[stormdancer0]

Smiler, we have problems with patience because basically, we are selfish, self-centered over-grown children.

I've only been baptized in the Holy Spirit for four years, so I understand completely. I want God, I want MORE of God, and I want Him RIGHT NOW!! I wish I could say, "God" and have Him just knock me over with the strength of His love. But if He did that, I would end up worshiping the feelings, and not the One behind them.

Your "impatience" sounds more like hunger for more of Him to me than actual impatience. Never lose that. That is a POSITIVE thing. We know that there is nothing we can do, no acts we can perform, that will make God love us any more than He already does. His love for you is already bigger than creation itself. But we can do things to please Him, living a life He would have us live. This is how we draw closer to God.

That and prayer. Spend time in prayer every day. Just talk to God like you would your very closest friend. Be sure to have times where you listen for Him, too. Prayer is supposed to be a conversation.

Read the Bible, because through it, God speaks to us as well.

And know that there will be times that emotionally, that hunger, that desire to be close to God, just isn't there. These are the times that you actually grow in the Lord. Persist in prayer and study, persist in doing good, persist in loving God even when you don't feel it. As you go in and out of these dry seasons, your faith will grow, and your desire for the feelings fade as you become more satisfied with His simple presence. (They have never gone away totally, thank God!!)

These are just things that I've discovered over the past four years.

The most spectacular miracle of all is the moment that the Holy Spirit of God comes to live inside your heart. I've seen dead people brought back to life, but nothing beats that night He moved into my heart forever. That will always be the biggest miracle to me.

 

[Alive_Again]

Patience is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. If you're impatient in your natural life, entering into the flow is the answer getting over "natural" tendencies.

Use the power of binding and loosing too. After reading The Power Manual by June Newman Davis, I've noticed that depending on where I'm at and who I am around, I start experiencing "manifestations" you can seemingly put a name on. I've gone from being blessed and at peace to irritable, to feeling pressed, impatient, etc. You can pick up on the assignments others are suffering from. Now I might normally look within myself to take the blame, but only moments ago I was blessed and at peace, and I didn't do anything wrong to grieve God. So, as I read in the "Power Manual", bind up impatience, loose patience. Bind up anger, frustration, loose the peace of God, the joy of the Lord. Do this with your lips. Use the name of Jesus. See results!

If God is dealing with your life and the problem is you, then you might need to repent of something, but otherwise if your well being suddenly seems to change, use the authority you were given on earth since you have a tongue, and are connected to the Holy Spirit. Bind and loose. This is just one of a number of weapons of warfare at our disposal.

I would sometimes play the "greeter" at the front door of church on Sunday and would observe the spiritual climate as people would walk in. Many bring in "stuff" (oppressions) they picked up in the world, often by what they loose (permit) watching TV, or in spending time with unbelievers. Bind and loose and see a change as you effect the spirit realm.

I could go on, but my posts always seem to be long. The big encouragement is, that a walk in the Spirit is an adventure. You have spiritual senses just like you have natural senses. The Holy Spirit is the best teacher in the world and you can develop them and work with God to effect change, literally life, in the world around you. There's no reason to be bored. No reason to just hang out in front of the tube and veg out. That will drain your fruit and leave you complaining. Get a ravenous appetite for the Word and hang out with people on fire for God. Let your life become an adventure! Keep learning! Walk in what you learn and receive more revelation knowledge!

 

[aiki]

I am famously impatient - I want things to happen NOW!

One of the fruit of the Spirit is patience. If you've been "baptized in the Spirit" shouldn't you be exhibiting this fruit?

I was baptised in the holy spirit just over 4 weeks ago; I didn't feel anything but since that very moment have been able to speak in tongues. That alone should be evidence enough for me shouldn't it, but oh no I want to full caboodle - the lovely warm feeling, the just knowing that the Spirit is active in you.

Um, a "warm feeling" isn't the basis upon which the Bible tells us we know the Holy Spirit is working in us.

I don't want the falling on my knees bit, but just want some other evidence that it has really happened for me.

The Word of God tells us that the moment we are saved we are indwelt by God's Spirit. We get no fuller a portion of God's Spirit than at that time. If you want evidence of the indwelling Spirit look for the fruit of the Spirit in your life.

Why am I thinking this? I have real faith; I know God, Jesus & The Holy Spirit love me, I have faith that when I pray in this strange language I am getting right through to heaven, but why on earth do I want the other physical signs too?

Do people who don't pray in tongues not "get right through" to heaven? And what are you praying exactly when your language is unintelligble to you?

I almost feel when I'm praying something is blocking me; I was brought to tears on Friday but nothing since then.

What brought you to tears?

Feelings are unreliable, I know that but why am I always so impatient for yet more signs that God loves me?

Why indeed? Would you believe in God's love for you if all you had was the testimony of Scripture to that effect? If not, what does that suggest about your faith?

Selah.

 

[Smiler33]

Thank you for your responses.

Stormdancer, you are so right when you say it sounds like I am hungry for more and more of God. I am doing my utmost to live a life that pleases Him; people are seeing the difference and I am definitely feeling it. It's amazing!

Alive again, that binding and loosing sounds really interesting. So you bind the bad and loose the good don't you. I'm definitely going to investigate that once I've finished reading my 3 books on the Holy Spirit !

Aiki, it seems you think I'm very shallow in my faith. I am trying to learn and do the best I can; this is all very new to me. At the moment I am going on what I have read and heard from other people's reports. As for praying in tongues, it is for personal edification and I have no idea what I am saying - only God and the Holy Spirit know that and they're talking to my spirit. They're fixing me from the inside out.

 

[FaithPleases]

We are told to talk to God like he is there. Why does he seem not to talk back?

 

[stormdancer0]

Thank you for your responses.

Stormdancer, you are so right when you say it sounds like I am hungry for more and more of God. I am doing my utmost to live a life that pleases Him; people are seeing the difference and I am definitely feeling it. It's amazing!

Alive again, that binding and loosing sounds really interesting. So you bind the bad and loose the good don't you. I'm definitely going to investigate that once I've finished reading my 3 books on the Holy Spirit !

Aiki, it seems you think I'm very shallow in my faith. I am trying to learn and do the best I can; this is all very new to me. At the moment I am going on what I have read and heard from other people's reports. As for praying in tongues, it is for personal edification and I have no idea what I am saying - only God and the Holy Spirit know that and they're talking to my spirit. They're fixing me from the inside out.

Just remember that people who have never experienced speaking in tongues will try to drag you down and claim it's a lie. Those of us, like you and me, who've experienced this miracle know better. You are very young in your faith, and there is nothing wrong with your need for more tangible signs. You can't expect to have ocean-deep faith when you've only just discovered the shore.

As for the fruit of the Spirit - patience being one of them - does an apple tree worry about why there are no apples yet? I know I'm an apple tree, so where are the apples? How can I work harder, pray harder, study harder, in order to grow apples?

Of course not. The apple tree produces apples naturally. They just happen. Not to say you don't have to work at all on it. But if you take in the vital nutrients - prayer, fasting, Bible study, etc. - that you need to grow, the "apples" will come naturally. You can't try to produce fruit. All you can do is allow yourself time to grow and mature, and as you do, the Spiritual fruit will happen almost on its own.

In all the books you read, don't neglect the Bible itself. Remember that every other book is man's interpretation or understanding of the Bible, but the Bible is truth itself.

Please keep in touch. There is another forum - one for Pentecostals - on this site, where you'll get much more support from those of us who have chosen to go deeper and receive what you have received.

(And before I get blasted, we have gone deeper than we used to be, not deeper than non-Pentecostals)

 

[Smiler33]

Thank you very much Stormdancer - to reassure you I do read the Bible too on a daily basis, I just like to read the other books too! I will check out the other thread you mention; is it the Pentecostal/Assemblies of God one?

I'll keep doing everything mentioned on a daily basis and won't let any of this slip. It's an exciting time for me and I like to think it's exciting for God too seeing me develop!

 

[aiki]

Aiki, it seems you think I'm very shallow in my faith. I am trying to learn and do the best I can; this is all very new to me.

Faith grows as a muscle does: With use. If you're just new to the Christian walk, well, no one ought to expect you to have the deep faith that only comes through time and experience walking with God.

At the moment I am going on what I have read and heard from other people's reports.

I see...I would be careful not to hinge things too much on the reports of others. Your walk is with God first of all, not other people. THe best reports you can go by are the ones found in the pages of Scripture. I would urge you to trust them before all others and to assess the reports of those around you in light of the testimony of the Bible.

As for praying in tongues, it is for personal edification and I have no idea what I am saying - only God and the Holy Spirit know that and they're talking to my spirit.

Hmmm...I just don't see any place in Scripture that supports what you're saying here. If you don't pray with understanding, how can you benefit from it? No where that I'm aware of is it indicated in the Bible that your spirit has its own unique but unintelligible language. Be careful with this stuff, sister.

They're fixing me from the inside out.

Yes, they are. But the Word of God tells me that there other means by which you are "fixed" than through spirit prayer you can't understand. Do you know what those means are?

Selah.

 

[aiki]

We are told to talk to God like he is there. Why does he seem not to talk back?

He talks back in the pages of Scripture. Remember, the Bible is God's Word to you and to every Christian.

Did you expect that you could talk with God as you would someone sitting across the table from you? If so, let me ask you: How much of what He has already said to you in the Bible are you heeding? Sometimes, we want to hear from God directly even though we are not careful to listen to and obey what He has communicated to us generally in His Word. I think God is waiting for us to do as He has already asked us to do in the Bible before His interactions with us grow more direct and intimate. Just a thought.

Selah.

 

[stormdancer0]

Thank you very much Stormdancer - to reassure you I do read the Bible too on a daily basis, I just like to read the other books too! I will check out the other thread you mention; is it the Pentecostal/Assemblies of God one?

I'll keep doing everything mentioned on a daily basis and won't let any of this slip. It's an exciting time for me and I like to think it's exciting for God too seeing me develop!

Yes, that's the one. You will be welcome. Especially helpful are members the_sheepdog, lilmissmontana; and byhisstripes. They are all mature Pentecostal believers, and all have an amazing relationship with and trust in Christ.

He talks back in the pages of Scripture. Remember, the Bible is God's Word to you and to every Christian.

Did you expect that you could talk with God as you would someone sitting across the table from you? If so, let me ask you: How much of what He has already said to you in the Bible are you heeding? Sometimes, we want to hear from God directly even though we are not careful to listen to and obey what He has communicated to us generally in His Word. I think God is waiting for us to do as He has already asked us to do in the Bible before His interactions with us grow more direct and intimate. Just a thought.

Selah.

I talk to Him all the time. And yes, He does talk back, in real conversations. Sometimes He reminds me of a scripture quote. Sometimes He engages in true one-on-One conversation. I don't know every command and direction in the Bible. I don't know anyone who is even close.

But I know if you want direct, intimate interactions with God, He will gladly offer that to you. It takes Bible study, yes, but also prayer and fasting, and a deep, "I want it more than I want to breath" desire. God will direct us through His Holy Spirit, in direct Spirit-to-spirit contact and discussion.

It's happened to me many times.

 

[aiki]

I talk to Him all the time.

As do I.

And yes, He does talk back, in real conversations.

As He does to me, too, only its via His Word, which I can't confuse with "voices in my head."

Sometimes He reminds me of a scripture quote.

Yes, I believe God brings His Word to our minds - provided we've taken the time to secure it in our heart.

Sometimes He engages in true one-on-One conversation.

I'm sure this does happen - but not as the norm.

I don't know every command and direction in the Bible. I don't know anyone who is even close.

Oh? There aren't that many commands, really.

Matthew 22:37 - 40
37. "Jesus said unto him, 'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.
38. This the first and great commandment.
39. And the second is like unto it, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'
40. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."

I do know men who are very great scholars of God's Word, who know it thoroughly and intimately. And there is no mistaking that these are men of God.

But I know if you want direct, intimate interactions with God, He will gladly offer that to you. It takes Bible study, yes, but also prayer and fasting, and a deep, "I want it more than I want to breath" desire.

I agree that all these things are important to a deep walk with the Lord.

God will direct us through His Holy Spirit, in direct Spirit-to-spirit contact and discussion.

Really? Where is a Spirit-to-spirit discussion mentioned in Scripture?

It's happened to me many times.

And how can you establish that you weren't just talking with yourself?

Selah.

 

[stormdancer0]

As do I.

As He does to me, too, only its via His Word, which I can't confuse with "voices in my head."

Yes, I believe God brings His Word to our minds - provided we've taken the time to secure it in our heart.

I'm sure this does happen - but not as the norm.

Oh? There aren't that many commands, really.

Matthew 22:37 - 40
37. "Jesus said unto him, 'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.
38. This the first and great commandment.
39. And the second is like unto it, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'
40. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."

I do know men who are very great scholars of God's Word, who know it thoroughly and intimately. And there is no mistaking that these are men of God.

I agree that all these things are important to a deep walk with the Lord.

Really? Where is a Spirit-to-spirit discussion mentioned in Scripture?

And how can you establish that you weren't just talking with yourself?

Selah.

I will not defend myself or my faith to you or anyone else. I've argued and cited scripture til I'm blue in the face. If someone is genuinely interested, I don't mind talking about it, but I see no genuine curiosity in your questions.

IF you can't tell the difference between talking to yourself and hearing from God, I can't explain where you'd understand it anyway. But how were all these people in the Bible "led by the Spirit?" How did Peter know that Ananias was lying? How did they know to set Paul and Barnabas apart for a mission? The Spirit spoke to them. Did He appear as a ghost or ghoul and speak verbally? Probably not. He spoke to them Spirit to spirit. What other option is there? Casting lots? Guessing?

 

[aiki]

IF you can't tell the difference between talking to yourself and hearing from God, I can't explain where you'd understand it anyway.

Its not that I think God can't "speak" to us apart from His Word, its just that one must be very careful to distinguish what one wants to "hear" from what God is actually saying. This can be very difficult if one is not very familiar with Scripture.

But how were all these people in the Bible "led by the Spirit?" How did Peter know that Ananias was lying? How did they know to set Paul and Barnabas apart for a mission? The Spirit spoke to them.

And what does this mean, exactly? How did this "speaking" occur? Audibly? Through consensus among those involved? What? I'm immediately suspicious of anything one says is real but cannot be clearly defined. What God has revealed of Himself is very plain. His truth is also clear and well-defined in the Bible. Yet, when it comes to how He communicates to His children suddenly ideas and terms become vague and highly subjective. Why is that? God isn't the author of confusion, so why the difficulty in defining what being spoken to by God's Spirit entails? Surely, of any area in the Christian's experience, this one ought to be crystal clear.

Did He appear as a ghost or ghoul and speak verbally? Probably not. He spoke to them Spirit to spirit.

Okay. But what does this mean? Do you mean a strong impression? A phrase or word that suddenly pops into mind forcefully? Chills? What?

What other option is there? Casting lots? Guessing?

The Word of God prayerfully and wisely applied.

I don't mean to be antagonistic, but this matter of being spoken to by the Holy Spirit has been used by the Christians around me to promote all sorts of nonsense. At times it has been very destructive. I just get kinda' fed up with how subjective and loosely defined this area is and how, as a result, it is easily corrupted and made to serve selfish, carnal ends. I have no issue with you personally, however, and don't wish to leave you thinking that I do.

Selah.