feelings are passing, time itself is passing, but I don't want to be cheated out, somehow deceived by my own deceptions, by deceptive feelings, choosing to go the way of indifference rather than stepping out into the unknown or more difficult path but ultimately the one with the better reward. I missed things before, missed the trip, missed the boat, missed the mark. Truth will keep me there, faith will get me there, and no matter how it looks, the Spiritual eyes always have a greater depth perception than the physical eyes. Laying it all on the line is much better than settling; much better than being forever haunted that you could've done better, that maybe you should have took the chance and didn't. In the end it wouldn't have mattered if while you were enduring that you felt that you weren't good enough, or you hoped for less and got it because that is what you set your expectations for.