Life As Lulu

So it appears things are going very well in my relationship.

But anyways off that subject.
I was attending mass at a catholic church near my house for a few weeks to see what i thought about it. I thought it was beautiful. The only thing is, i do not believe that the catholic faith is the right pathway for me because there are alot of beliefs in the religion that i do not agree with. So even tho i love the way the worship and they're way of pretty much doing EVERYTHING, i do...

Lindseyk

I am very afraid.
So afraid i cannot even describe it.
HE WONT LEAVE ME ALONE!
He threatens me.
He curses at me.
I just cant take it anymore.
I have to do somthing.
What this somthing will be is still unknown.

Do i call the cops?
Do i keep running from him?
Do i stoop to his level and act back?
NO!
I am the bigger person.
I cannot do that.

I guess i just have to suffer.

Lindseyk

I love to pray.
It makes me feel closer to god.
And that is a very good feeling for me.


I never used to be close to god.
I used to hate him.
I was one of those people who said "i blame him for everything bad that is happening to me."

BUT NOT ANYMORE!

God is my best friend.
I love him.
I never want to lose him in my life again.

It was a bad feeling.

Lindseyk

The other day i made a video.
I showed it to my mother.
She started to cry...

The video was of photographs of myself.
The music was the song HUMANS by: The scene Aesthetic.
That song is just so beautiful and basically describes my life.


It gives me hope <3

Lindseyk

This is the 4th time i have been with my boyfriend, and for some reason it is ONCE AGAIN ending up in a fight.
I just simply cannot stand him, yet he is one of the most important people in my life. Cant you understand that? Because i can't.

So here i am, blogging about it. What else is there to do? I cant look him in the eyes and say "I cannot stand you", right?

Or is that what i am to do? I dont believe that. I believe that if he REALLY is this important...

Lindseyk