Thoughts

I feel in my heart that what I want is a boyfriend. But I know that wont solve what's really bothering me. I want to be loved. But not by myself. And not by God. but it just seems that in the ways that I try to reach out to someone else, it backfires and leaves me with an even greater sense of being alone.

The loneliness I feel, to a great degree, is my own fault. I push people away by my own reclusiveness. But in an odd sense, I also believe that God is allowing me to...

rita727

rita727

New day. New start.

Let's do it.

rita727

Frustrated
Distrustful.




hope.

rita727

!@*$&@!
I was doing so well beforehand. But I'm grateful I didnt gain as badly as I thought.
So this whole week's gonna be damage control: I cant let my feelings control me this time. I cant let feeling depressed because of all this tension get me another time. If I gotta suffer--and I probably will-- then I need to go the full distance, before I finally see the numbers I want so badly.

rita727